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Monday, December 24, 2007

Merry Christmas or Xmas or whatever you call it

Well, it's Christmas Eve, and that means another year has gone by.

It was a big year for us.

My son started Middle School, my wife started a new job, and I retired from the Navy.

I started this blog, spent considerable time in my wood shop, and learned how to make Kreplach soup. All in all, a pretty good year for me. So there's not much I want for Christmas tomorrow - well not much I'm likely to get anyway. I wouldn't mind finding a Work Sharp WS3000 under the tree tomorrow - with the optional leather honing wheel, or maybe a cordless Dremel tool, nothing fancy, I already own a number of rotary tools - but I want one I can dedicate to the chainsaw sharpener. Other than that, I really can't think of anything material wise.

Non-material wise, well, yeah I can think of a number of things - none of which I'm likely to get. I'd like every one of my brothers in arms to come home safe and alive. I'd like this idiotic war to end. I'd like the those responsible for this mess to be held accountable, both those who started this with 911, and those who used that atrocity to further their own agendas. I'd like my nation to renounce torture as a national policy, and while we're at it, I'd like the Director of Central Intelligence to spend the next month strapped to a waterboard, right next to Donald Rumsfeld, but instead of water, I'd like to see Coke Classic poured up their noses. I'd like the current crop of Republicans to shut up about their religions - in fact, since I'm making a wish here, that goes for pretty much every proletizing religious wanker in the US, shut the fuck up and leave me alone. I'd like the current crop of Democrats to grow a collective spine and a pair of balls and start doing what they were elected to do. And I'd really like the presidential candidates of both stripes to be collectively abducted by space aliens, subjected to anal probes (big silver vibrating anal probes, especially the Republicans), shaved, chipped, dyed green, trained to do tricks, and placed in a zoo on the the Alien's home world, where small gray children with big heads and bulging eyes on 6th grade field trips taunt them and throw alien peanuts through the bars (I have this mental image of them all sitting on Monkey Island, flinging shit at each other. Obama claiming the situation is Clinton's fault. Clinton screeching that it's Obama's fault. McCain gibbering about his time in Vietnam and how this is just like that. Huckabee screaming and shaking his little monkey fist and periodically chasing Romney furiously about the enclosure. Fred Thompson as the grumpy old Silverback. Ron Paul sitting all alone in a tree at one end of the island, playing with himself and periodically flinging turds at the gray skinned children and the other monkeys. And Kucinich standing on the highest rock, thumping his bony little chest and bellowing 'I told you so, I did...')

Ahhh, hell, I guess I'll just be happy if I get the Dremel tool.

Merry Christmas all.

7 comments:

  1. Yeah, pipe dreams are always fun.

    For me, Christmas has mostly been an inconvenience this year, because it means I can't get the chiropractor to fix my screwed up shoulder until Wednesday, when I really would've rather he did it last Friday. So for two more days I get to wake up with a stiff neck (but only on the screwy side).

    Then again, on the flip side, Christmas break does mean I get a week and a half off work, because the institute likes putting 7 of our 12 holiday days of the year all in a line next to each other in December (which means it gets stretched really thin the rest of the year). I'm not back at my desk job until the 2nd.

    I guess I should probably try to think of something cheery to post about Christmas though, even though I don't celebrate it.

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  2. I gotta say I'm glad you decided to settle for the Dremel, 'cause otherwise you're just setting yourself up for disappointment. And we'd all hate to see that. OTOH, its always good to set the bar high. :-)

    Merry Christmas, Don't get anything stuck on the roof and here's hoping you get to use only indoor plumbing through the holidays.

    BTW, This year we pretty much ignored Hannukah in favor of Christmas. Jule and I always do the big deal stuff on Christmas Eve, opening presents periodically while gorging ourselves all night on a succession of appetizers. This year I demanded that we include gefilte fish (which actually tastes mostly like nothing, but is a great excuse to eat something with horseradish on it). If you come up with too much of any appropriate white-fish next year, maybe you'll want to add that to your repertoire later. (I'm bound and determined that a real Uncle Gudolf should come into existence up there on The Last Frontier.)

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  3. Yeah hold out for the Dremel. Aliens probably have been watching and are likely to realize how high maintenance the candidates would be even in a cage. Oh and as for the rest of the shit... Well you watched it develop just like I did and with the blind leading the stupid there is only hope that the war will end as soon as stooopid leaves office.

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  4. MWT, you and me both. I've had worse than usual shoulder problems for the last two days. The pain is not nearly so bad today as it was yesterday though, but it still isn't fun.

    On the other hand, it did snow last night, which means that it was too cloudy to see the lunar/martian eclipse (drat). Today is cold and nasty out, but we got everything done yesterday. Which means today I can stay inside and cook. So, you know, not too shabby all things considered.

    As to the dremel - I just want the cheapy $40 cordless, just so I can permanently mount the chainsaw sharpener to it. At the rate I'm cutting turning blanks I need to sharpen the saw about twice a day. And the cordless lets me take the sharpener into the field with me. With the dremel sharpener I can resharpen the blade in minutes in the field, vice have to change out the dull blade for a new one, realign and retighten. Much faster and simpler, and this time of year you really don't want to be wasting daylight.

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  5. There was an eclipse??

    I thought I saw a planet right next to the moon last night! Must not've been my imagination after all!

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  6. MWT, that was Mars, closer and bigger and brighter than it will be for another 15 years.

    Can't see it tonight from here either, which stinks because I've got the scope all set up. On the other hand, it feel like snow which is good too.

    Oh and just in case anybody was wondering - the eleven year old is going ape shit. Ahhh the torture of xmas eve. Is there no greater parental joy?

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  7. Heh, now would be a good time for someone to announce the invention of the teleport, because the sky is looking quite clear and nice where I am. In another hour (here, at least) the moon and Mars will probably be next to each other again. Unfortunately, I have no scope.

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