Surfing around yesterday I came across this clip from South Park. Now, I'm not a big South Park fan (Yeah, I know, surprise surprise, but I'm not), but it got me thinking (and you know where that leads).
And you what? I think they're on to something with this.
Think about it. Whenever a guy gets into trouble doing something stupid, it's usually because he was trying to impress a girl. Oh, come on fellas, we can admit it. We're like peacocks, just another big stupid bird scratching in the dirt - until the peahens show up. Then all of a sudden we're spreading our gaudy tails and and making loud obnoxious noises in a bid for attention. This isn't any secret, it's hardwired into us. More trips to the emergency room can be attributed to this one male quirk than all other manly endeavors combined. It's not our fault, we just can't help ourselves.
And I got to thinking, you know, the United States is a lot like a guy. A big, blustering, swaggering, beer swilling, tractor pulling guy. And Canada? Canada is a lot like a pretty girl. A country girl free and full of promise, with a come hither coquettishness and socialized medicine that just begs us to impress her. And so we continually embark on feats of strength and daring-do, hoping she'll go to the prom with us. Instead, we end up in the emergency room.
See? The logic is inescapable. It is all Canada's fault.
Maybe I need to watch more South Park.