Sunday, October 18, 2009


I’ve got a large number of requests for turned birdhouses. Really, it blows my mind - in a good way.

The number of requests for turned birdhouses has not yet, however, exceeded the number of requests that I drop dead due to my genderfailing.  If only I had a dollar… what? Oh, yeah, sorry, never mind. But someday I am going to figure out how to profit from the Die Sexist Pig Die! meme. I swear. Even if I have to wear a Leia Biki… What? Oh, right, sorry again.

Anyway, the birdhouses.


There will be many.


Later this week.

Be patient, it’ll be worth it.


  1. I'd pay extra for the Leia bikini.


  2. Good to see you're feeling better about the whole screechy monkey thing. ;)

    I wonder how long it'll take for someone to juxtapose birdhouses with the Leia bikini incident and analyze the literary and cultural significances in their dissertation. >.>

  3. Can I get pictures of you in a Leia bikini turning the birdhouses?

  4. AAAAAAAAGGGGHHHH my eyes. Michele why did you have to go and do that?

  5. I want a birdhouse wearing a Leia bikini for my next piece.

    See how I objectified the birdhouse, there? That's because I'm an anti-birdhouse wood-hater.


    Hehe. I kill me.

  6. Hey Jim,

    Relatively new to your blog, here, so please excuse my ignorance. Is there a post/cite/etc. that you can link me to where I can consider prices for your award-winning (the last posts won awards in my own mind, anyway) birdhouses? I'm not as flush as I'd like to be, but know a few folks who could use an unbelievably beautiful birdhouse for Christmas (or the north american cold seasonal holiday of their choice) and would like to have an idea if I could afford yours before I get my shopping list in order.

    Also - short time reader (found you through the site that shall not be mentioned, a month or so before it was unmentionable) who is very much a fan of your writing. Sorry that Author got you down. I'm still a pretty big fan of his, but I respect your choices, and plan to continue reading both sites.

    Heather, (AKA That - stupid google)

  7. Heather, just to be clear, I enjoy Scalzi's writing as well, but his site has become a place where he allows Anne Somerville and her ilk and their utterly insane hypocritical bullshit to run unfettered roughshod over his long time and loyal readers. Either he does it because he's afraid of them as evidenced in the racefail debacle or because he actually agrees with it. It's his right to run his blog however he likes, but either way, I'm out. I don't like what the place has become. As I said elsewhere today, at least when I was ambushed in Iraq I knew who had my back and I could shoot the hell back. The level of crazy over on the Whatever has now reportedly exceeded 450 comments for a lousy 3 line joke, frankly I pass. Some of those people seriously need to get either laid, or a life - and a sense of humor.

    Now, as to the birdhouse or other things from the shop, I list them when I have them available - usually as a blog post. But just for budget planning purposes the next batch of birdhouses will run between $30-$55, plus $10 S&H. The majority of the pieces available should be on the low end of the price scale $30-$35. The price depends on the wood and the amount of effort that goes into it. But, hey, I'm trying to keep in mind that we're talking bird houses and not the Mona Lisa ;)

    There should be a large number of pieces available later this week. I was hoping to finish a bunch today, but my wife (the damned feminist) made me winterize the house. Stupid winter.

  8. Thank you Michelle!
    I was thinking the exact same thing!!!


  9. You're gonna want to be very, very careful what you wish for.

  10. Also, how come I suddenly feel objectified?

  11. OMG, that was you, wasn't it?

    LOL - I hadn't twigged you made the original comment. I thought it was funny, in an embarrassing, oooh,-I-don't-want-to-think-about-that way.

    Can I skip the Leia bikini birdhouse idea? Please?


  12. that was you wasn't it?

    Unfortunately, Cassie, yes it was me. It was almost exactly like stepping on a land mine - in the middle of Chuckee Cheese's.

    I never saw it coming.

  13. Please do NOT bring up Chuck E Cheese's. The place is spawned of the devil, I tell you. O.O

  14. I would like a birdhouse but we mostly have hummingbirds. Do I birdfail?

  15. Your birdhouses are marvellous.

    "Be patient, it’ll be worth it."

    It's true. I have seen it.

  16. Natalie - I have a 7 year old (nearly) and I have still *never* set foot in a Chuck E Cheese's.

    But I hear they do serve beer. Or are you always the DD? :p

  17. There's a Little Caesar's opening across the street from me. (In the place where the "Cajun" teriyaki chicken and egg rolls were.) That's as close to Chuck E Cheese as I want to get.

  18. I'm all for foodie fusion, but Cajun teriyaki chicken and egg rolls??? Doesn't even sound appealing.

  19. Chuckie Cheese's is hell. I went there for the first time a week or so ago with the sister and the nephews.

    Most of those games aren't even proper _games_. They're more like training grounds for slot machines in Vegas.

  20. Lee & Miller have a character who has a very pithy saying:

    The only thing you need to know about **char name here** is:

    1. Can they shoot?
    2. Will they aim at your enemy?

    Such soapy sentiment gets me every time!

    By the way, I loooove the orange agate wood on *my* (mine, mine, mine, despite my husband and son trying separately and together to acquire it) birdhouse.

    I have two different aunts, a sister, and a friend who will want one if they ever see mine. So, I will have to buy them slowly as you have time to make and ship before I ever set mine out where it can be seen.

    Are you going to teach the son to make birdhouses so you can set up an Alaskan sweat-shop in fine wood products? Pay him by the piece, make him sleep in the building, charge him for his food, take away his passport and all that?

  21. Just managed to use the Leia Bikini line in response to a keynote speaker kevetching that the introducer wasn't dressed like the last one and in a chamois bikini.

    Thank you Jim for the insperation. It got laughs, including from the young man who did the introduction.

  22. Got the birdhouse. It is bee-yoo-tee-full. And soon it will be on its way to Germany to grace my BFF's tree-filled yard. Thanks again!

  23. I think you said something about making tiny ones for the Christmas tree- mine may end up gracing the tree as it is. Currently, it's cheering up my office and making my co-workers jealous.

  24. Mine arrived yesterday. Great work. Perfect gift. It's going to end up about 20 feet outside this window, right on that limb of the tree here in Ohio. I'll send a pic on Christmas morning.


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