Thursday, October 15, 2009

Attention Screechy Monkeys

You can stop sending me hate mail now.

I apologized once, I'm not going to do it again.

You're wasting your precious time, time you could be spending sucking up to famous science fiction authors and rubbing up against each other in self-righteous anger. Please, go there, do that, and leave me the hell alone. I'm not reading your silly nonsense, I don't give a flying fuck about your opinion of me, and it is very unlikely that your uber feminist frothy man-hating bullshit will change my outlook on life in any way whatsoever - an outlook, by the way, that is not what you think it is. You've made a value judgement about me based solely on my gender and you continue to do so - this makes you hypocrites and bigots of the highest caliber.

Maybe you ought to take a long look in the mirror before you take a poke at me.


For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, don't worry about it. I'm not going to link to the issue or give the site in question any more traffic or attention. Suffice it to say that I'm getting a large amount of hate mail from a bunch of perpetually offended man hating feminists with an all consuming case of penis envy.

In case you haven't noticed it, I'm taking a break from the Internet for a couple of days. This entire incident has pissed me off and left me feeling depressed and angry for reasons I'd rather not go into at the moment. I need a break. I'm taking one.


  1. This is still going on? Okay, I can understand how some people could be a little sensitive to the joke, but really, you set it up properly ("folks, this is a joke, you can tell from the 'um' statement"), changed POV well (now "speaking as one of them" for the irony of the last sentence), and poked fun at the original post (the "point and laugh" part).

    Steve Martin, Roxanne "Irony, oh no. People ski naked here while smoking dope, there's not much call for it. There hasn't been any here for eight years when I was the last practitioner and I stopped because I was tired of all the weird stares."

  2. So, am I allowed to jump on the sofa and put my feet on the table and eat chocolate and pet Shop Kat while you're gone?

  3. I love the quote, Steve. Enjoy a few moments of internet-free life, Jim. The ones who enjoy your wit will still be here when you feel like it again.

    Besides, where else could we find a cranky retired non-com who has a really cool lathe?

  4. Speaking as a woman, I found the joke funny and totally inoffensive. But I guess that means I have developed a Naval sense of humor by osmosis (not really -- it was here before I met TheHusband).

    I thought about trying to make monkey sounds in my comment but that was rather pathetic.

    Anyway, you already know my opinion of you. :-)

  5. Lauren, Jim's a traitor, he was commissioned. :D

    (A number of the WO's I bumped into while working for Naval Research were sensitive about that...)

  6. Is it wrong that my first thought was "Yay! More birdhouses!" ??

    (Yeah, it probably is.)

    Sorry to hear you're dealing with morons.

  7. In case you want to revel in some online inappropriate humor, Jim, have you ever run across My First Dictionary? I don't remember where I got the link, but this guy has a delightful sick sense of humor.

    No connection here. Just some humor.

    Dr. Phil

  8. Internet should appear as an example under "love-hate relationship".

    Meanwhile, I'll be over here on the sofa sharing my chocolate with Random Michelle and Shop Kat until you feel like being around the internet again. No rush - I have plenty of chocolate.

  9. Phiala, pass the chocolate. Please? Anybody bring pretzels? Jim seems to be out of them at the moment.

  10. Plenty of chocolate - well-equipped after a trip to the Netherlands last month. No pretzels, though. But I do have fresh Pennsylvania apple cider from the farm stand down the road.

    And it's a good day to stay indoors and drink cider - it's been snowing steadily since mid-morning, big wet slushy flakes. The ground isn't frozen, but it's still making a bit of a mess. Worse, the trees all still have their leaves.

  11. Phiala,

    Be careful not to touch any of his bowls or tools. You should have heard the yelling about fingerprints last time that happened.

  12. Oh dear, no! He's already grouchy. I'm going to sit right here on the sofa with the cat, safely away from anything that might be a problem.

    In fact, I'm not even going to look at the tools and such, just in case.

  13. John, TheHusband is also a traitor, although of the LDO variety (if memory serves).

    Jim, not that you need our validation, but we got your back.

    Or we would if you weren't such a mysoganistic fuck bucket.


  14. Sorry - that should have been:


  15. Hey, as a woman and a feminist, I read your joke and laughed. Some people just go around looking to be offended.

  16. Dr. Phil: it's possible I pointed you to My First Dictionary, which I whole-heartedly endorse. And this seems a good place to further endorse the brilliantly gross and funny Cyanide And Happiness if you're not already reading it.

    Jim, don't let the bastards get you down.

    And a note to any humorless jerkwads who come by here: feel free to come over to my blog and screech a bit. That's not a pimp, that's an invitation to come to my house so you I can tell you to go fuck yourselves without feeling like I'm possibly embarrassing my host. Because really, you should, you humorless shitbags.

  17. I am now looking forward to using the term "misogynistic fuck bucket" in conversation some day. After all, "The Shovel of Doom" (TM) is now common language amongst my coworkers...

    As for TheHusband being a traitor -- I take neither blame nor credit, as it was years before we met. :-P

    Phiala -- Jim gets downright snarly when I play with the power tools. Just because I am a complete klutz and don't have a clue what I'm doing is no reason to get all hot under collar...

  18. Go fuck yourselves, you humorless shitbags, I mean. In case that wasn't clear.

  19. Jim - for the record, folks are over-reacting to your post.

    But having a bit of a Navy temper too, I can understand the desire to take a break from the Internets.

  20. Eric -- I think you're right. These days I have a lot of blogs that I let sift by and I don't always remember where such-and-such came from.

    Dr. Phil

  21. [runs up, puts freshly baked cinnamon rolls on top of the workbench, and backs out carefully]


  22. I've got brownies!

    Someone get glasses for the milk!

  23. Oops.

    Anyone know how to get chocolate out of shag carpeting?

  24. ::rides through shop on drunken three-legged camel::

    Drops off Bushmills for the couchers...

  25. Anyone know how to get chocolate out of shag carpeting?

    Not sure, I always had dogs for that...then when I had roommates it was how to get the booze out of the carpets!!! BWAHAHAHAHHA.

    Pass the brownies please. I brought hot cocoa as the Atlanta weather report just announced December temps for the few days AND my heat just came on.

  26. Steve, I've got the pretzels! They go wonderfully with chocolate.

    Ooh, we need port! Anne C. introduced me to it during the San Diego Trollopalooza in June - soooo good!

    FWIW, to any lurking humorless feminazis: I am a staunch feminist who is super-sensitive to anything that smacks of sexism and who fully supports all gay rights. Guess what? I was amused by Jim's joke when I first read it. I still find it amusing (maybe it's that Navy humor - I am a born-and-bred Naval brat). And I'd like repeat Eric's statement:

    Go fuck yourselves, you humorless shitbags.

  27. how to get the booze out of the carpets



  28. Hmmm- what can I bring to the party? [goes to farmer's market, buys bushel of plums.......] is there any cider left?

    Jim- that sick twisted mind is a benefit from our point of view- take care of yourself!!

  29. Karl,

    I'm not sure about the host, but since he's not here, I'm declaring this a Jameson's blog. I'll bring the first bottle. (It goes pretty good with a good amber ale if anyone's wondering what we're lacking.)

  30. Goddamn it, Michelle is playing with the matches again. Will one of you catch her and make her stop. Last time she blew up the alcohol, burned up the brownies and melted the chocolate.

  31. Oh, we can't have that - melting the chocolate would be a tragedy. And there's all that wood...

    So how about I just bring along my dog to take care of any and all carpet spills - no worries, he likes cats and lets them boss him around - and we leave the fire for some other time?

    Sure, plenty of cider left. And Jameson's sounds good. I've got a bit of Tullamore Dew left too, and most of a bottle of port. One or the other, though - they don't mix well!

    This is turning into quite a party - maybe Jim should leave us unsupervised more often. :)

  32. Nathan, I had Jim figured for a Black Bush kinda guy - but since we're already out, bring it on...

    Gonna need to run to town for some more grilly bits - where'd that damned camel run off to?

  33. Gonna need to run to town for some more grilly bits

    I don't mean to start any trouble, but does that mean you're picking up sausages and stuff like that or some of the stuff Princess Leia isn't hiding so well?


  34. OK. How about I trade these matches for some Jamesons?

    And dark chocolate.

    Then I'll sit here on the sofa and be good. I promise.

  35. Nathan, Nathan, Nathan...

    The sausages in bikinis was the part we weren't supposed to think about. And now you've gone and done it.

    I'm just going to sit over here with Michelle. Whisky and dark chocolate is one of the great food pairings. Port and dark chocolate is also very good. Hm. Decisions.

  36. Perhaps ShopKat could bring us in a vole or two....

    [Tries a slug of Jameson's in the cider.] Yum, yum, yum.

  37. Boy howdy I'm glad I followed Jim from the Whatever to here. You all are major party animals!

    I make the world's best chocolate chip cookies, with or without walnuts, and danged good cream cheese cookie. I'll bring lots.

    (You can probably tell I was raised by an ex-Air Force guy. I can't swear worth beans, and if you told me to 'take that building', I'd find a realtor.)

  38. We like cookies. We like cookies a lot.

  39. Whiskey and bacon and dark chocolate. For serious. ;)

    Hell with it - grill the camel...

  40. Eh, isn't camel kind of tough?

    Whisky and bacon and dark chocolate? I can see that, particularly with a nice smoky whisky.

    A local restaurant makes dark chocolate-bacon cheesecake, which is just amazing. No really. I haven't tried it with whisky, but that should be a future experiment.

    We have gotten a ridiculous amount of wet slushy snow for mid-October in Pennsylvania. The power has been on and off all night, and it's supposed to continue until Sunday. I am not amused.

  41. I've 30-40 pounds of various home made sausage, and most of a bottle of Knob Creek, for those that want real whiskey. I've also a lot of home made tomato juice if somebody has vodka and hot sauce.

    Be right up.

  42. How about some nice hard cider to go with the sausage? And homemade Oreos, please Michelle? Pretty please?

  43. Phiala, grew up in Western New York, know all too well about the perils of October slushy snows. yuck. Bad for the trees too as wet snow + trees with leaves = damaged trees.

    We just finished several weeks of monsoon level rain, crappy weather, then more rain and fog. Some in the area were threatening to build arks. My ceilings are decorated in weird brown patterns, as I told the roofers yesterday, if it's sticking up out of my roof, the flashing's failed! Now they say the weather has cleared BUT we're going to have December temps for the next 5 days. And high winds...the over-stressed trees will start falling in ernest now. Hot'lanta is not living up to its name this year!

    So, as the weather seems to be better in Alaska, I'll just stay with y'all in the shop. Pass the dark chocolate please...oh, lovely, a warm fuzzy kitty in my lap wanting to be petted!

  44. NeuronDoc, I am so wanting you to use that phrase. At work. With your outdoor voice. Hehe.

    Lauren, Michelle might give you a run for your money on the whole "best cookie" claim. Michelle makes AWESOME cookies.


  45. Janiece, Michelle can be the Best Cookie Maker, I only claim supremacy for my choc. chip and my cream cheese cookies. But I looooove cookies, too, so I wish I had Michelle's to compare mine against. There's always something new to learn when making cookies.

    Sadly, I don't drink alcohol. I can't hold my liquor, and I end up buttering my shirt instead of my dinner roll after a single margarita. So I'll be the Designated Driver!!

  46. No, no, no! I demand a cookie-off, to be decided by a taste test of the cookies! To be decided by myself, of course, although I would be willing (if sufficient cookies are provided) to share judging duties. And this jug of milk.

    Being a very cautious and discriminating judge, I must inform all prospective entrants that I am absolutely incapable of judging a batch by only one cookie.

    (PSSSST--Janiece, don't blow this! We could have LOTS OF COOKIES as part of a "contest" and then declare it a tie... no, no, no, wait, that's wrong, strike that! We could say we have to have a round of... uh... "cookie appeals" in order to decide whether the first batches were just, I dunno, something scientific-sounding about flour. Hmmm. I wonder how long we could put off a decision?)

    Uh, further announcement, candidates: as you know, judging cookies is VERY, VERY DIFFICULT. So this process, bear with us, it may take several, uh... years.

    (PSSST--I don't think we have enough milk.)

    What? Nothing, nothing, carry on--no, wait!

    (PSST--this is gonna be AWESOME!)

    --I have just realized we can't just allow ANY cookies into this contest. Therefore there will be a QUALIFYING ROUND in which those who wish to participate--

    (--yes, yes, we're gonna let everyone in, hush--)

    --everyone who wants to participate in the cookie judging must submit TRIAL COOKIES for a COOKIE AUDITION! And then AND ONLY THEN will we decide which cookies shall be compared for the, uh... FIRST ROUND of the, uh, COOKIE OLYMPICS!

    (::high five!::)

  47. This comment has been removed by the author.

  48. I haven't baked cookies in a very long time, but I used to be REALLY good at it. During the December holidays I'd bake three kinds: peanut butter, sugar and Reeses Pieces cookies (chocolate chip recipe, but with Reeses Pieces instead of chocolate chips).

    May I enter my cookies, Judge Eric?

  49. Janiece, I just don't have the balls for that. Still haven't used "butter my butt and call me a biscuit", although I fantasize about it.

  50. Lauren, I dunno about the Air Force/Navy swearing theory. My father was in the Air Force and has a potty mouth. I inherited that, although I've really toned it down. TheHusband was Navy enlisted who became a j.g. (before exiting), and he never swears. Never. It's annoying because anytime my daughter repeats a bad word in front of him, the evil eyes of doom swivel towards me. And pretty much rightly so. He also doesn't drink, so he can be a designated driver, too.

  51. neurodoc, my father - the Navy man - rarely swore and my mother - the Navy wife who pretty much raised six kids by herself since my father was overseas so often - swore a blue streak (though she hates the F-bomb).

    Maybe my father would've sworn more if he had been around us more often when we were younger.

  52. My language in the Army was as potty mouth as you could get, although I've heard worse from a TV director, but barely.

    At least I never came home on leave and asked my mother to 'pass the f-ing butter'. Which was about the only way to get common items in an Army mess hall.

  53. Sweets, I got the joke straight away and thought it was really funny. Thought I'd see if I could contact you privately and tell you so, as I had no interest in stepping into a mud fight, then saw you'd posted about it here and thought it better in the circumstances to post my support publically. I personally don't think you even needed to apologise.

  54. 'm not good at cookies, but my apricot bread kicks butt! Eric, I don't like milk, so that's more for the cookie-dunkers.

  55. I make awesome oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, if I do say so myself.

  56. Apricot bread???? That sounds really interesting (in a good way).

  57. Holy crap, people aren't content to keep their over-reactions confined to the, you know, conversation and have to seek you out to offer harassment?

    Rude-ass muthafuckas. Cowardly, too, as they seem to know better than to express themselves and their idiocy publicly.

    And as long as there's a party, I can bring a kick-ass shredded beef chili.

  58. Anida,

    Here, have a brownie AND an homemade oreo!

  59. Mensley,

    Well, they did express themselves and their opinion of me publicly on the forum where this mess started.

    I put up this post a day after the event. So the bulk of the foamy fanatics who followed me home during the initial hoopla didn't have any place to post their condemnation, hypocrisy, and condescending attempts to "educate" me on my egregious and multiple genderfailing - so they apparently felt it necessary to email me in order to express their contempt and disgust at my sexist objectification of womynly females from my lofty and wholly unearned position of privilege in the white male power structure.

    Most of the hate mail has slacked off today, though my email address appears to be making the rounds.

    And to be fair, I did receive a small number of supportive emails - all from women. Which I deeply appreciate.

    A certain amount of the hatemail came from men - who I assume were just trying to get laid by impressing the feminists with their sensitivity.



    I apologized because I apparently insulted a large portion of the readership on somebody else's site - and because the host apparently agreed with them that I had indeed given offense.

    Based on his rapid reversal, abject apology, and self debasement during the Racefail incident on the same site earlier this year, it seemed to me that discretion was the better part of valor at that point. So I apologized and removed myself from his site, permanently.

    Obviously my apology was not adequate for the insulted parties - but then I suspect that the only thing that would appease them is if I poured gasoline over my head and lit myself on fire.

    They are welcome to hold their breath while they wait for my self-immolation.

  60. Hey Jim,

    You're back! Woohoo!

    Sit down. Lemme pour you a cookie. And I baked some drinks.

    (Sorry everyone, I don't know how to type drunken slurring. Please imagine that I just did an awesome impersonation.)

  61. Lauren, (I missed your comment first time around. Eric distracted me, damn him). I've got several of my recipes on my website. Including pictures of the entire oreo making process.


  62. Welcome back, Jim. As I've noted elsewhere, "take care of you."

    You can rest assured that I consider you a person of the highest moral fiber, and I'm proud to call you my friend. Not that you need my validation to feel good about yourself, but as a put-my-money-where-my-mouth-is feminist, I do consider you one of the good guys, and I want you to know that.

    Also, the bird house arrived today. It's lovely - thank you.

  63. Jim,

    I thought your comment was hilarious.

    I was sad to see that a number of people felt it necessary to be asses about it.

  64. Jim may be back but he brought me with him... Now Michelle, put down the matches, everyone step away from the tools and stop doing what you are doing to Shop Kat. This place is like an chocolate version of an opium den. Aww who got sticky stuff on the FESTOOL! That's it you are all grounded until the shop is back in order and where did all the bird houses go. Come on empty those pockets and don't make me come over there.

    Sorry dude I came late to the party. Let's hear a good heavy duty stream of CWO curses and see something fly toward the burn barrel and get back to our regularly scheduled program.

  65. But, um... ShopKat was enjoying it. Honest!

    Jim, I'm sorry that everything got so out of hand. I though your joke was funny, and also thought your apology was perfectly reasonable (someone else's house, as you said).

    I'm also sorry that you are going to quit playing over there (though of course you should do as you see fit - no sense going somewhere you don't feel welcome). Why? Because I saw your comments there, and found them to be interesting and insightful, and followed you home.

    Most of my very favorite places on the internet are the ones where intelligent and articulate people who don't necessarily agree on everything can get together and talk about it. You've attracted such a group here, and that speaks very highly of you.

    Thanks for letting me sit on the couch. I swear I didn't spill that cider, and I wasn't anywhere near the chisels.

  66. Hey, I didn't even read that thread - it bored me by the end of the first page and I abandoned it. I'd rather be here talking cookies!

    If Judge Eric is going to be judging cookies, I think we ought to demand a 9 member panel, like the Supreme Court, plus some expert witnesses. I imagine that a lot of taste-testing will be required before a decision can be issued.

    And, Jim, I hope you don't abandon that site forever. I like what you write. If you do however, I already followed you home, so it will be hard to get rid of me, heh heh heh.

  67. Ah, Nathan, so you're not so think as we drunk you are.


  68. What? This bird house? It was in my pocket when I came in. Honest.

  69. ::raises hand:: Um, is the FESTOOL that thingy over there in the corner? If so, then, er, um, it was me. But it wasn't my fault. It was the, um, er... it was Evan. He made me do it. And anyway, mmm, chocolate.

    I've already followed you home. I've got my claws into this site like a kitty stuck to a pillow. It has power tools, chocolate, and a host with sharp wit, intelligence, incisive comments, and humor. What more could I possibly want?

  70. I've already followed you home. I've got my claws into this site like a kitty stuck to a pillow. It has power tools, chocolate, and a host with sharp wit, intelligence, incisive comments, and humor. What more could I possibly want?

    To be independently wealthy? Copious amounts of alcohol? A healthy back?

    Hey, I'm just trying to help, here.

  71. Phiala said Most of my very favorite places on the internet are the ones where intelligent and articulate people who don't necessarily agree on everything can get together and talk about it.

    Absolutely. And that's one the things that attracted me to the place years ago. However, in recent years, and especially since the Racefail thing, the place has become a great deal less tolerant while pretending to be uber-tolerant.

    I find the entire Racefail/Genderfail argument obnoxious and hypocritical and ridiculous and condescending (Yes, I do know that makes me a racist and sexist according to the racefail/genderfail crowd, who are completely welcome to fuck right off).

    If, on a post specifically about pointing and laughing and sarcastic wit, a commenter can't point and laugh and engage in sarcasm - well, then I have no further use for the place. I won't be lectured on my supposed failings by a bunch of miserable self hating people who are mad that they weren't born something else, and I sure as fuck won't be condescended to by the host, especially since we're all "just words on a screen" to him.

    He has the right to run his place the way he wants, but it's no longer a place I enjoy. There's way too many of the Making Light crowd over there now - and they are a bitter and obnoxious lot and I want nothing to do with them.

  72. And I also said that life's too short to spend time in places you don't feel welcome, or something to that effect. So yeah. Not that you need my or anyone's approval or understanding.

    Apropos of absolutely nothing: It says "Phiala" on my posts, and if I ever meet any of you, I answer to "Phiala" far faster than to my legal name. But I'm by no stretch of the imagination trying to be anonymous - my legal name is all over the internet, and clearly associated with my chosen nickname. Don't know why, exactly, but that seemed both relevant and important. Possibly because having names to go with identities helps to limit the kinds of insanity that go along with internet pseudo-anonymity.

  73. Not that you need my or anyone's approval or understanding.

    Well, true, but life's a whole lot nicer when you do. ;)

  74. No offense, but it's not like the joke was so sophisticated that it left itself open to misinterpretation, save for the willful kind.

    Primary joke: Sure, women can contribute to science fiction... by wearing skimpy outfits! (not only does the author not believe this, the joke wouldn't make sense if he did)

    Secondary joke: Men at sci-fi conventions tend not to have the greatest physiques. (gee, that's controversial)

    Anyway, I thought you got a raw deal over there. You might wanna stay away from the whole "man-hating feminists" bit though. There's maybe a dozen of those in the whole world, and they're too busy getting their asses kicked by sex-poz fembloggers to venture out into the rest of the internet.

  75. Gil, no offense taken, you're spot on. I personally don't see how anybody could have taken my comment as anything other than sarcasm.

    As to the "man hating feminists" comment here - well, that was intended as a deliberate insult.

  76. One thing I'd like to clarify for everybody:

    It never occurred to me in any way shape or form that my joke would be interpreted to include a bash at men (either gay or straight or something in between, hell it never occurred to me that it would be interpreted as a bash at women - it was intended as agreement with the gist of the original post, in the manner of the post, i.e. point and laugh). I didn't even know there wear men who wear the Leia Bikini to SciFi conventions. It never crossed my mind at all. I honestly didn't know there was such a thing. The last scifi convention I attended was years ago, and I never saw guys doing the bikini thing. I honestly didn't know this was a big deal. For men OR women.

    Of course, my ignorance makes me a privileged bigot in the context of Race/GenderFail logic. Because I'm white and male and straight I can be ignorant of things that I would have absolutely no logical way of knowing, that's part of my privilege.

    The truth of the matter is that I made the comment while half awake waiting for the coffee to finish.

    I didn't intent to insult anybody in any way, far from it. Hell, at that point I didn't even read the article that sparked the post in the first place. I thought the whole thing was stupid, hardly worth a smartass comment, certainly not worth the attention the subject was getting, and was hoping that the coffee would finish sooner rather than later so I could get to work.

    When the first horrified feminist expressed her outrage, I was surprised, I thought she just misinterpreted what I said (maybe she hadn't had any coffee yet either) so I responded with a "whoa, hang on, I'm joking. Put down the tar and pitchforks" intending that to be humorous and thinking that she'd get the joke, heh heh, and things would carry on.

    It wasn't that she didn't get the joke - it's that she, and those like her, suddenly became all foamy and started in with the genderfail bullshit about white male privilege and how because I have external plumbing I'm not allowed to even make jokes. The fact that I don't immediately express my self loathing for my own sex and then debase myself abjectly by allowing myself to be lectured ad nauseum proves that I'm a horrible sexist. Then suddenly, another woman made a snide comment about how my joke about women wearing bikinis at science fiction conventions is somehow homophobic! SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK?

    I expected the host to step in and put a stop to the screechy monkey craziness, as he does on EVERY OTHER topic - instead, he agreed with them. Which just utterly floored me.

    In retrospect I shouldn't have been surprised, especially after the racefail thing and how he responded by lighting himself on fire. I just expected more from him and from the readers over there - they used to be a much higher class of people in general.

    Understand something here: I have absolutely no right whatsoever to question how he runs his site, we are all just words on a screen to him no matter how long we've been there, he's made that abundantly clear, and it is my failing for expecting otherwise. However, now that I do, indeed, understand very clearly how things work - I find I'm not at all interested in hanging out there.

    I'm not telling anybody else what to do. I'm not even trying to express disapproval. If you enjoy the site in question, by all means, go there and enjoy it.

  77. Kanye can't help himself...and neither could I.

    (You can delete it if you want, but I thought it was funny!)

  78. Jim

    I gave your line about the Leia bikini to my wife, who was/is a kick ass feminist before Gloria Steinem got ears and a tail and she thought it was great, I didn't even know she knew how Leia was.

    I don't know what racefail means and am not going to bother to look, but several items about race there have disturbed me and this (as with somebody else that post didn't do anything and I never got to your joke until this showed up) really bothered me. doubt I'll be back either. I'll also be reading him from libraries, if at all, in the future.

    Beastly, it was a certain syfy author who shall remain nameless that droped the chisles on the concrete, not the party.

  79. Fuck, Nathan, you might have warned me. I think I just ruptured one of my sexist testicles laughing.

    Thanks, you're the best.

  80. ntsc, see the fact that you would claim understanding of the situation or a sympathetic viewpoint because you know a woman, are married to a female, and played the feminist card makes you a sexist by genderfail logic.


  81. I'm reading the comments in reverse order.

    Neurondoc, FESTOOL are extremely high end power hand tools. Drills, routers, sanders, and etc. They are very expensive, very precise, absolutely top of the line when it comes to woodworking. Beastly sells FESTOOL, both he and I own and use FESTOOL extensively (I got mine from Beastly, who, it must be said, it doesn't suck to know, just saying).

    If you spill anything on the FESTOOL, especially the TS 55 EQ plunge saw, you'd better start running now. It won't save you, but at least you'll die out in the road and not in my yard.

    Now, where'd I leave the shotgun shells? Hmmm....

  82. Hey Jim. Glad you're back, though you totally don't have to explain yourself.
    I wasn't offended myself, and honestly don't agree with the stance that the only way to deal with a challenging subject is by being Serious about it. No surprise then that Blazing Saddles is one of my favorite movies.

    [edit out frothy rant of my own about navel gazers -- they're not worth the time]

    Hope the internet break has been good!

  83. I kept well away from the tools and didn't spill anything- well, maybe one of those home-made oreos (5-second rule rocks!) Expect a large pile of SQUEEEE! to show up soon- my birdhouse just arrived!!! (packed in bubble-wrap for that extra levelof enjoyment...)

  84. Glad you're back and that I followed your link if you're not going to be at whatever anymore. I, 48 yo female, thought your joke was funny and the foghorn leghorn bit was icing. The comments was like watching a train wreck in slo-mo and ended up with Ann Sommerville (I will NEVER read her books) declaring women that don't agree with her are gender traitors.

    BTW very nice bird houses.

  85. And at last, somebody got the Foghorn Leghorn part of the joke, I figured that was a dead giveaway. Later I realized I was only oppressing poultry. Sigh.

    Sommerville is a special kind of crazy - and the epitome of what I'm talking about when it comes to racefail and genderfail. If you're male, you're the scum of the earth, if you're female you're a traitor if you don't believe exactly what she tells you to.

    She condemns anyone and everyone, including her own supporters - and yet her comments are laced with obvious bitterness and regret (she slipped in a little nugget in one of her comments elsewhere how men don't look at her any more because she's old and ugly, alas, or words to that effect. Jealous much?). She is utterly incapable of speaking without condescending. The woman is so full of hatred for herself, her gender, and men that it's a wonder she hasn't choked to death on it.

    She obviously scares the shit out of a lot of people though, including the folks on Whatever.

  86. Jim,

    You're thinking about it way more than it deserves.

    Here. Have a cookie. And then make more chicken jokes.

  87. Hi Jim,

    I'm accepting your kind offer to hang out here for a while.

    I visited the Whatever site tonight. What really blows my mind is that the thread is still going strong, three days later. And by going strong, I mean the "usual suspects" are still discussing, disecting, and debating one flip comment by the now infamous Jim Wright.

    Still. Arguing. About your joke. Passionately.

    Nobody's talking about the original piece, which was about how men who think that women are ruining SF, well they're kind of pitiful. (Which we all agree.) No, they're vigorously debating your comment, and still insisting that anybody who thinks you were just joking is a privileged sexist or worse.

    Three days later. I can hardly believe it. Jesus could resurect and roll the stone faster than some of those posters can figure out that minds are not going to change.

    I was going to post something about how my consciousness might be pitiful and in need of major uplifting, but it was not ever going to be uplifted by a certain angry woman with a penchant for dogmatic hatred of any who will not agree with her, especially those of the opposite gender.

    Then I said fuck it, why bother? It's not like I'm going to make any impact on her worldview, nor those of any other angry "person who's not privileged" on that site.

    I get it. I'm the enemy who's keeping so many people oppressed and downtrodden. No sense in making my self any more of a target than I am.

    And so my hat's off to you, who did make yourself a target (albeit unintentionally).

    Illegitimi non carborundum, Jim.

  88. Christ, they're still beating that dead horse? Seriously?

    Perhaps someone should tell them that no one cares but them.


  89. I got the Foghorn thing - I say, got it, that is. Actually what came to mind first was Bugs Bunny in a skirt and blonde wig, puttin' the moves on Elmer. Ehhh - crunchcrunchcrunch - Somebody's gotta put on the part.

    And a day late and dollar short - should have posted this over there - CLICK

  90. Thanks for coming by, Nick, welcome aboard.

    Janiece, no kidding huh? Where the hell does Nathan come up with this stuff?

  91. I'm sorry this is going on.

    As an ardent feminist myself, I also agree that people of any strong belief can tend to forget their sense of humor when it comes to the topic they're passionate about. (see your Democrats/Republicans/Libertarians post!)

    I've very much missed your posts this week. Selfishly speaking, I hope things settle down soon and that you're ready to return to your regularly scheduled station (pun intended) soon.

  92. Where the hell does Nathan come up with this stuff?

    I can't really claim any huge credit here. I literally "StumbledUpon" the Kanye This website. The only thing that took any thought was figuring out what to have him say and trying it out on my own site first to see if it left a noticeable trail on my stats. (It didn't seem to.)

    It didn't take a whole lot of imagination to know that I had to use the thing once I'd found it. My self-restraint is famously lacking. :)

  93. Great to see you back!

    I'm a dastardly engineer of the female persuasion and past veteran of scifi conventions. If a good-lookin', well built man wore the bikini, I'd give him a gander. Wouldn't be the strangest thing I've ever seen.

    (I do have a dildo, but I never bring it to work. Might make the guys run in fear.)

    ps We tried making our own birdhouses, sorry for the mess.

  94. Jim, it was Evan who spilled the beer on the FESTOOL. I don't drink beer.

    And anyway, FESTOOL sounds like a lab specimen.

  95. That's it I'm coming back to SKS and if there is any beer on the FESTOOL (not poop of a FE) then it's all over. I may just have to break down and clean the place or something just as threatening. (because scrubbing when I'm pissed is about as harsh as it gets anymore or have I always done that Jim?) either way who is going to explain why shop cat is lying on its back making those weird noises.

  96. either way who is going to explain why shop cat is lying on its back making those weird noises.

    Catnip brownies. Sorry. He'll come down in about thirty minutes.

  97. She. She'll come down in about 30 minutes.

    We don't need anymore gender issues around here, thank you very much.

  98. So, forgive my need to have everything all nice and tidy.

    To sumarize:

    1. They're assholes.

    2. We're not.

    3. 'Net with us, please?

  99. My first comment on your blog - I just wanted to say I thought the whole genderfail thing was blown out of proportion. I thought your original comment was actually pretty funny - and I am a feminist (and a woman). Apparently I'm just not a screechy one. And I didn't read the article Scalzi was originally referring to, since I assumed that would probably be too much for me. But your comment made me laugh out loud. Anyway, I like your blog, and please keep writing.

  100. Gah. I went back over there last night.

    I really hope the recession lifts. So many of those people really need jobs.

    I know I'm late posting, but I hope you're doing better, Jim.

  101. Sorry, Jim, it was...uh...me still getting used to the keyboard on the myTouch. Yeah. That's it.

    (Actually, I was using CFN's laptop, but I'm just going to blame all typos/incorrect gender assignments for the next week on the myTouch keyboard.)

  102. My understanding is that the comment thread over there is closed now. Some of Sommerville's comments final comments were relayed to me, along with those of others.


    I remain simply astounded at this entire event..and immensely saddened.

  103. Yes, I saw the end of it. Friends forwarded me the final bit.

    Wow. Just wow.

    I'm pretty sure that uses up all the hypocritical assholery in a thousand mile radius.


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