Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Can You Imagine If We'd Walked The Whole Way?

Blatantly stolen from Rodgers at Ku Fu Monkey.

Because, well, you'll see...


  1. You should look up their "How Star Wars should have ended" if you haven't seen it already.

    "Death Star will be in range in fifteen minutes--"

    "No, the Death Star is in range--now"

  2. Seems I misquoted from memory a little, but what the hell? Anyway, here it is if you haven't seen it.

  3. So, basically, the writers set aside the most obvious solutions in favor of some inexplicably illogical ones to make the plots... longer? convenient? more exciting?

    I'm never picking up another book or watching another movie ever again!

  4. It looked like Gimli was yellinig

    "Your mother was a hamster and you father smelled of elderberries. You English pig dog!"

    "Now go away or shall taunt you a second time!"

  5. Oh on come, Ilya. There's a balance between too sparse and endlessly prattling on.

    And Tolkien was the king of prattling on with every thing and the kitchen sink. But then: Trolls! But then: Orcs! But then: A blizzard! But then: A fire! But then: the Eagles, we're saved!

    The LOTR trilogy - it was worse than War and Peace. It just kept going on and on and on on on on. And on. By the middle of The Two Towers I was ready to jump off a building. I realize some people like that level of detail, and I do too to some extent but I also appreciate it when the author gets to the point, sooner, rather than later. I read the series once, long ago, and never again. Jackson's pairing down of the story for the movies I thought much improved the story - and even then by the end of the TROTK I was ready for it to be over.

    I am looking forward to what he does with The Hobbit though - which I think is the best thing ole JRR ever wrote and quite possibly the perfect fantasy novel.

  6. Thank you for that Jim. So much time could have been saved. Guess those silly hobbits just like doing things the hard way.

  7. The Blair Witch one is great too.

  8. Thanks, Jim. I needed that giggle.

    I have to admit that I didn't read LOTR until the movies came out. As a librarian, I wanted to see what the fuss was about. I never was a huge fan of Tolkien, and well, I'm still not. The only reason I lasted through all thousand pages, was because of THIS site. It was much easier to slog though the whole thing thinking "Still the prettiest" to myself.

    I liked "The Hobbit", but I found it a bit depressing. I really don't like long, fantasy travel novels. In my opinion, the only author that does it well is David Eddings. There is nothing dry about those books.


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