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Sunday, April 11, 2010

Newsflash! The Party of No Says No!

The Bush Doctrine is alive and well in the GOP.

You’re not familiar with the Bush Doctrine?

The Bush Doctrine in a nutshell: Find a bogyman.  Fill yourself with hysteria.  Shoot first and let God sort it out later.

Senate Republicans warn that they’ll filibuster any attempt by President Obama to appoint “anybody outside the mainstream” to the Supreme Court when Justice Stevens steps down this summer.

Wow.

Boy, didn’t see that coming.

Can you just see the strategy session?

“Good God, man! Obama gets to appoint another Judge. What are we going to do?”

“Well, we could get involved, make some bi-partisan recommendations…”

“Traitor! Heretic!”

“I recommend obstructionism!”

“Hey, that sounds good. That’s original. We’ll say no”

“That’s it then. We’ll go with a strongly worded no!”

 

Like Jihadists, they only seem to have one option:

 

“Praise Allah, man! What are we going to do?”

“Perhaps we should seek peace. Work together for the common good.”

“Traitor! Heretic!”

“I recommend a suicide bombing!”

“Yes, yes, that sounds good. A suicide bombing!”

“That’s it then. We’ll blow ourselves up…”

 

Stick with what you know, I guess.

 

It’s not like you couldn’t smell the GOP panic when Stevens announced his retirement. Oh God! Oh God, why hast thou forsaken us! Good thing these guys warned the President. You know, just in case Obama was thinking about nominating a dope-smoking, flaming-gay, left-handed, long-haired, card-carrying-communist, goat-humping, draft-dodging, lactose-intolerant, illegal-alien, cat-petting, tree-hugging, decaf-drinking, reptile-in-a-rubber-human-suit, sissy-pacifist, America-hating, late term abortion doctor. Booga Booga!

Senate Republicans are demanding that Obama pick a moderate, middle of the road Judge who will place the law above ideology.

Buwaha?

Really?

What a novel idea.

Oh, wait. Wait. I might be confused.

By “place the Constitution above ideology” does that mean pro-creationism, anti-science, doctor-shootin, gun-totin, immigrant-hatin, born-again, wire-tappin, water-boardin, tractor-pullin, drill-baby-drillin, war-mongerin, Jesus-lovin, Iran-nukin, corporate-lobbyist-panderin’, one-man-one-woman-lovin, Old White Guy(tm)?

Just say no, folks, just say no.

24 comments:

  1. ::howling with laughter:: If this weren't so funny, I'd really be crying at the gravity and reality of it all.

    I wish I could wrap myself in the Stars and Stripes and be all "patriot white man" while making things more difficult in my own country.

    The best I can do is a maple leaf (nowhere near as impacty) and be all-black man (we won't go there and use the word republican in the same sentence...) while enjoying what I got.

    Rob G.

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  2. Yeah, they're looking at the 2010 elections and doing what's best for "taking their country back," a phrase that makes me want to to great bodily harm to people who say it.

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  3. What most fucking pisses me off is that none of the people on what's assumed to be the President's short list are anywhere near being liberals--at least one (Elena Kagan) has been described as being center-right. The NOP's (Naysayers' Old Party--just came to me; if you like it, use it, otherwise fughedaboudtit) idea of "mainstream" is someone hard-right.

    Not that it necessarily matters--I've said a number of times that you don't necessarily know how a Justice is going to be until they're on the bench. A significant number of "liberal" Justices of the past several decades have been Republican appointments, including John Paul Stevens (Ford).

    Whatever. These bastards will try to poison the process, but I don't know that they have the votes to do it, even if they can stall the process 'til after November and pick up some Senate seats.

    You do know, of course, that one of the leading pushers of obstructionism is Newt Gingrich, who apparently has forgotten how well the government shutdown of '95 worked for his party.

    ::arrgh::

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  4. Well, now they're saying "No" even before they know what they're saying "no" to. I mean, that's gotta be some kind of step forward, some improvement. It takes a really good process to be able to say "no" before someone asks, "what do you think about this?"

    Or great stupidity.

    Time to get out the big brush labeled, "unscrupulous obstructionist" and start painting.

    entibi - wasn't that one of the Star War worlds?

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  5. Preemptive Obstructionism.

    You just gotta love it. Especially the part where they say it's not because they're racists. What a bunch of fucking tools.

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  6. Crying, but then thanks to Jim, laughing at the same time.

    "Preemptive Obstructionism": Like it.

    "The NOP's (Naysayers' Old Party)": Like it.

    "I mean, that's gotta be some kind of step forward, some improvement. It takes a really good process to be able to say "no" before someone asks, 'what do you think about this?'" : Hahahahaha!

    My spouse has started using, "Palintology" and "Palintologists." I like those too.

    I also really like Eric's profile photo. It be cool.

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  7. In all fairness, I have a hard time imagining anything the Repubs might say right now that would inspire a "Yes" from me. Even a "Maybe" seems like a long shot.

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  8. Yech. Newt Gingrich. Just yech.

    Just one of this state's more embarrassing politicians. I cringe every time he shows up at something these days because I know he can't keep his mouth shut.

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  9. Um. Mr Kettle? Um, you have heard of Bork, right?

    "To defame or vilify (a person) systematically, esp. in the mass media, usually with the aim of preventing his or her appointment to public office; to obstruct or thwart (a person) in this way.

    I kinda feel like Forrest troll(sorry I had to fight in the middle of your Black Panther party). I'm sure your minions will deal with me in an Alinsky(Find a bogyman. Fill yourself with hysteria. Shoot first and let God sort it out later)manner.

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  10. Pat, I doubt my minions will give your silly comment nearly as much attention as you'd like.

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  11. I am NOT a minion.

    MY husband is a minion.

    Janiece's minion to be exact.

    Oh, was there supposed to be more to that comment? (checks) No, I think minions was the take home message there.

    Anyway, where's my chocolate?

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  12. Speaking of my minion, Michelle, where the Hell has he been?

    Bad minion, BAD.

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  13. I can confirm that Michelle is not a minion, she's more like an evil henchman - except she's not very loyal and she won't do my bidding.

    Actually, come to think of it, she's a lousy henchman, but she's definitely evil. Definitely.

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  14. Yup. Not a minion, too small for a henchman, but I've totally got the evil thing down PAT.

    After all, I've been a Democrat for years and years!

    diess = What Golum wants Frodo to do.

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  15. I guess I need to know what minion benefits are. If I get glowy red eyes and batwings or a boss black cloak (or--oo!--wings and a cloak!), I might be in. But if I just have to mince around with my back hunched and lisp "Nyes, Mnasterrr, nheh-hehn-hehn!" and risk being electrocuted in the lab, fuck that noise. Also, we're talking working wings, not, like, some lame cosplay cloth things that just flap around uselessly--I want a six-foot wingspan and full aerodynamics, flying onto rooftops and picking up goodie-two-shoes types and dropping 'em outta clouds wings, is what I'm talking about.

    Also, I need a James Earl Jones voice and maybe, like, cloven hooves or something. I mean, I'm pretty okay with my voice, but a credible minion needs something really profound. I'm not trying to be too demanding here, I think these things would benefit the organization as much as they'd be cool for me, you know?

    Otherwise, sorry, I've got better offers, man. Get back to me when you're serious.

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  16. I am not a minion. I am an Evil Doctor. And I like brainzzz.

    Just sayin'

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  17. did somebody say chocolate?? Have one of the minions get it for us.

    Oooo...wait, there's some on my desk. Office minion is around here someplace. Oh, wait, it's from the Easter Bunny getting lost last week.

    Oh well, chocolate eggs are better than no chocolate anyday.

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  18. I'm too bloody stubborn to be anyone's minion. Try to command me and I will stay rooted in one place and stare at you in disbelief.

    Probably a good thing I never entered the military.

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  19. Carol Elaine! Don't eat meat! Don't wear leather! I ORDER YOU!

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  20. I'm too tired today to be anything other than a minion, unless that means I have to actually DO something. If so, I can't even rise to that today! So, may I just be a minion taking a mental health day?

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  21. I forgot to acknowledge: "'I wish I could wrap myself in the Stars and Stripes and be all "patriot white man'..."

    Hahahahaha "all patriot white man"- Good one!

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  22. Michelle, CE is not your Show Pony. I have it on the HIGHEST AUTHORITY.

    And where the Hell is my minion??

    grumpie = I swear I'm not making that up.

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  23. Heh. Seems *I* have become The Bad Minion. I hate it when that happens.

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  24. Janiece, your minion is where he ALWAYS is, sitting in his chair with his feet propped up, playing on his computer.

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