Tuesday, April 15, 2008

What I won't be doing today...

...is going anywhere near the Post Office.

As I've mentioned elsewhere, the Palmer Alaska Post Office is a nightmare under the best of circumstance. April 15th? Not on your life.

We filed our taxes as soon as the W-2's came in. I say we, but it was really my wife. If it was up to me - I would be standing in line at the Post Office today. So, yeah, thanks, dear.

Busy today, more later.


  1. Be sure to buy your wife chocolate or flowers or whatever she likes best to thank her for being so wonderful.

  2. Well, with the economy being what it is at the moment, the best thing I could do is not buy her anything. :)

  3. And she is wonderful, in so many ways. Accounting ability being just one of them.

  4. Draw her a flower in crayon or something. :)

  5. I'll draw her a foot massage in crayon.

    Seriously, foot massage? That's why we have a jacuzzi. Sheesh.

  6. Being someone who had no choice but to wait until the last possible moment (fucking AZ employers and taxes anyway) and not being one who will enjoy any return this year (fucking feds, fucking NY) I have to say it was a painful experience nonetheless. The hell with taxes! and to hell with the various means of trying to suck money out of any return I may have received anyway. For being a poor bastard I just so happen to wonder how the tax laws were written to suck every available penny out of my pocket while I am still well below the poverty level. While we are at it Fuck the government, corporate America, the oil companies, taxing internet purchase, and all the rest of the money sucking world... AGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!

  7. Beastly, well, yeah, that's what I actually meant to say :)

  8. Jim, if you think a jacuzzi is better than someone actually giving you a foot massage, and if you can think of any possible... er... consequences, of your generous foot massage...

  9. Jim, listen to Michelle. She is wise in the ways of the world. And women.

    Beastly, I am in awe of how articulatly you put that. According to the Cato Institute, the number of pages of federal tax rules increased 42 percent between 2000 and 2006, from 46,900 pages to 66,498 pages. When I was studying accounting in college, the professor in my first tax class started the first day out by telling us to forget everything about accounting we had learned so far as they weren't applicable to tax accounting.

  10. When I was studying accounting in college

    ACK! They're EVERYWHERE!

    (My brother has a double undergrad degree in accounting and finance, and before he moved to the Dept of Debt, was the foreign tax specialist at WVU. He'd say things like, "you know, we have this tax treaty with Guam," and I'd run from the room.)

  11. You won't give foot rubs? That's just wrong. Foot rubs are a marriage staple. My husband has figured that out. I will admit that I'm not a bath person, so he can't get out of giving me a foot rub by offering me a bath. It does helps that I have nice feet. My husband doesn't mind putting his hands all over them.

    As for taxes, we got those out at the beginning of April. We got to file jointly this year, which felt really odd. I used to get the AARP volunteers to do my taxes at the library. They did a wonderful job, and I'd usually be their first e-filing customer, so they could test out the system. I usually had my refund deposited in my account by the end of the month. This year we went through my husband's tax person. I think it was the first time I'd filed a paper format in seven years, and I have no clue when we're going to get our refunds. I have a feeling that next year we're going back to doing it MY way.

  12. Look, it's not like I won't perform a foot massage for my lovely wife. I would.

    But, here's the thing - I tend to push too hard, see because when my wife rubs my shoulders I like her to push hard, otherwise it does me no good. At all. I'm kind of wired that way and while I'm not particularly large or strong (especially in my hands, which have sustained repeated damage), my wife is very petite, and rather than do her any good, I usually end up hurting her.

    Now, the Jacuzzi has a pair of pulse jets specifically designed for foot massage, which we can set however we like.

    So, shut up about the foot massage, will you all? Sheesh.

    And beside, I do other nice things for her. I do.

  13. (hand on hip)

    And DID you? Did you cook her a nice yummy dinner to thank her for the fact that you didn't have to go to the post office today?


  14. Of course.

    I cook dinner every night. Why? Doesn't your husband?

    For the record, last night was turkey Italian sausage on yellow rice, with green and yellow beans. Filling, tasty, and very healthy.

  15. Unfortunately, my husband *does* cook dinners on weeknights.

    I say unfortunately because his forte tends to be prepared foods (i.e. salmon burgers from the fish market, premade frozen pastas with extra shrimp and vegetables added.)

    But to be honest, it's not entirely his fault. My grandmother needs to eat early, so we don't have much time for prep when we get back from the gym at 6:15. And since his mise em place is *much* slower than mine, you tend to need to double the amount of time something takes.

    Well, that and the fact our favorite really fast dinners my grandmother can't eat, due to salt, or too much spice, or tomatoes, or dairy, or vegetables with vitamin K, or...

    Really, I'm only bitching a little.

    It's not her fault her diet is limited. I'm just not going to make fajitas or cream of broccoli soup or whatever if she can't eat with us. So, we're limited. (shrug)

    And he does have many other redeeming values. Such as being able to do wiring and plumbing.

    And cleaning the cat litter.

  16. Michelle, well, he sounds like my kind of guy (if I had a kind of guy, that is, which I don't, not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm just saying).

    Pre-made Salmon burgers? Argh! Sacrilege. Blasphemy!

    Let me help:

    One can, Red Salmon (pink is dog food, dog food. Reds are high in HDL and Omega-3 fatty acids, the good stuff, Pinks are not), drained.
    1 egg
    2 tblsp mayo (or 'Miracle Whip' if you've got egg issues, add 2 tablespoons more if you need to delete the egg)
    1 tblsp Dijon mustard
    1 cup Stove Top Stuffing (this is the secret, STS has all the spices and is the perfect size pieces).
    2 tblsp Bisquik (or flour, or not if you have gluten issues)

    additional spices to taste, me I like garlic powder, dried onion flakes, Lowry's Seasoning salt, and Zatrain's Cajun seasoning. However, all can be deleted, the STS mix will give the patties good, if mild, flavor.

    Mix all together, add more mayo or stuffing mix depending on how wet the mix is. You want it to hang together, but not runny.

    Shape into palm sized patties, about 1" thick. You'll get 6 out of one can of salmon.

    Dredge each patty in bread or cracker crumbs.

    Fry in 1 tblsp olive oil and 1 tblsp butter (or use non-fat cooking spray) until golden brown.

    Simple, quick, and good for you.

    We like ours with Tarter Sauce:
    1/2 cup mayo
    2 tbspn Dijon mustard
    1 tsp lemon juice
    1 tsp Worcestershire sauce
    1 tblsp dried dill weed
    1 tblsp dried tarragon flakes
    dash dried paprika
    dash pepper
    3 finely diced kosher dill pickles (Clausen, of course)
    1/4 finely diced small white onion (I chop the pickle and onion in a small spice grinder, like a mini food processor. You can also leave them both out, just add a little more dill weed and tarragon).

    Mix all together and let sit in the fridge for at least an hour before serving.

    Pre-made salmon patties. Shudder.

  17. Jim, if it helps any, they're made in house, with fresh salmon and other ingredients. The ones we like best are the spinach & feta ones.

    They really are quite excellent, have ingredients my grandmother can eat, and require no prep time.

    I've given Michael several recipes for salmon burgers. He's studiously ignored them. :)

    But I'll print out yours and see if he takes a hint.



    Sorry, Michael and the clue fairy are not on speaking terms. Sometimes he even misses the clue-by-fours.

  18. Michael and the clue fairy are not on speaking terms

    Oh yeah, he and I would get along just fine.

    Spinach and Feta, eh? Sounds good, I may give that a go.


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