Dear James Wright,
We've added Customer Ratings & Reviews to ___________.com!
Thank you for your recent purchase from ________.com.
_______.com knows we have the most knowledgeable customers and we value your feedback! Please take a couple of minutes to review the item(s) below. You will be contributing to the woodworking community with your valuable insight. It's easy to review a product, just click "Rate it!" and follow the on-screen prompts. With your help, Customer Ratings & Reviews will be a useful addition to __________.com. Thank you for being a customer and for sharing your opinions with us!
Your Recent Purchases:
3/4"x 3/4" x 5" - Purpleheart
Now my life is complete.
I’ve been asked to rate a block of wood.
Honestly, folks, what is the deal with this nonsense?
When the hell did we start having to rate everything?
I bought something from eBay a while back and for weeks afterward eBay and the seller pestered the shit out of me. Please rate me! Please rate me! Please rate your purchase! You have to rate your purchase!
You want a rating? I’ll give you a rating:
|Seller was awesome. Prompt and reliable. It is extremely difficult to obtain unbaptized human child fat for use in ritualistic demon raising these days. I was reluctant to purchase online, but had no other options as local orphans have grown lean and difficult to catch. Seller was able to supply large quantities of buttery yellow baby lard at a reasonable price. Will definitely purchase from again!|
Do these ratings actually matter? Will people read my review of a block of wood and say to themselves, “Hot Dog! I gotta get me some of that!” And it’s not enough to submit of review of my purchasing “experience,” they’re after to me to tweet them up and like them on Facebook. It’s a block of wood. I make pens out of it. I ordered it from a supply house, I didn’t realize I was entering into a social compact with these people.
Where does this end?
- Charlie Sheen would like you to rate your date!
|Capri Anderson: Negative Stars. Ended up naked and screaming in the hotel hall. Then had to make small talk with ex-wife and rug-rats while waiting for the cops! Did NOT get paid. WTF? Worst “date” ever. Boo. Would not date Charlie again.|
- The Tea Party Express values your opinion. Please take a moment to share with us your recent public curbstomping experience by our jackbooted Storm Troopers!
Save the Whales:
Awesome! Thugs very effective. Especially liked having my head crushed against the cement. Will always treasure the sound of my skull imploding. Concussion unexpected bonus. Will definitely picket Rand Paul again.
- Customer reviews of the new TSA Full Body Scan
Requested the “pat down” (Hey, don’t judge me, a guy offers to fondle my balls in an airport, I’m all over that). Got scanned instead. This is blatant bait and switch TSA.
P.S. The pictures are a total rip off, I couldn’t even make out the naughty bits.
Note: If you read and enjoyed this post, please take a moment to fill out our online survey.
Or we will hound you for the rest of your miserable life.