Nine Reasons to Reject Hillary
That was the title of a hit piece in The Hill yesterday.
Dick. Dick Morris.
Oh, Dick Morris. Sure.
You remember Dick Morris, right?
Why of course you do. Let’s see, October 31st, 2012, Fox News, The O’Reilly Factor:
DICK MORRIS, FOX NEWS POLITICAL ANALYST: […] let me go through the numbers because it's important for people to get it.
[Demonstrates irrefutable mathematical analysis of why Obama will lose to Romney]
O'REILLY: All right. That's pretty much what Rove did on his little board.
O'REILLY: […] So you are standing by your prediction of a Romney landslide?
MORRIS: Absolutely. Romney will win this election by five to ten points in the popular vote. And will carry more than three hundred electoral votes.
O'REILLY: All right. Now you know, Morris, I have you booked for one week from tonight. One week from tonight [after the election]
MORRIS: I know. But my question is, is my appearance going to be before or after you buy me dinner?
O'REILLY: I'm not buying you anything. I didn't bet anything, Morris. I got your back here.
MORRIS: In my book "Black Helicopters", I write about how the U.N. is sending inspectors to monitor the voting in the United States. What's going to happen is after Romney wins this in a landslide the Democratic narrative will be how the black vote was down. It was down because of unemployment and disillusionment. They'll say it's down because of voter suppression…
O'REILLY: Suppressed. Right.
MORRIS: And that's how this will go into history.
O'REILLY: No it won't because we're not going to let them get away with that. Morris, thanks very much. We'll see you next Wednesday. That will be high noon.
And it was High Noon, wasn’t it?
If you did happen to tune in the following week, you got to watch Karl Rove losing his shit on Fox News as his and Morris’ predictions of a landslide turned out to be true …
… it’s just that Romney got buried under it.
And now Dick Morris Fox News Political Analyst is back with nine reasons why America should reject Hillary Clinton:
1. She is a hawk who will get us into another war
Morris actually said that.
That’s his first complaint.
Clinton is a “hawk” who will get us into another war.
It’s one thing for liberals to consider Clinton’s supposed hawkishness a reason not to vote for her. But Morris is a conservative, and he’s saying it in of all places The Hill – a saber rattling conservative media outlet that has been advocating for war with Iran since it went into business.
At this point, the only way conservatives could be more pro-war is if they showed up for work goose-stepping in uniform toting their AR-15s.
Morris says, “By temperament, [Clinton] has a bias toward sharp, decisive action, is impatient with delay and terrified of appearing weak. She likes to be the tough guy.”
A bias towards sharp, decisive action? Impatient with delay? So now that’s bad, is it?
Somebody explain to me how this squares with the unending complaints from conservatives that Obama isn’t hawkishly decisive enough? That he doesn’t take action quickly enough when America is supposedly threatened?
She’s terrified of appearing weak.
Funny, Morris had a different opinion on the appearance of weakness back in 2008
But in an age of terrorism, weakness is a capital crime. McCain needs to base his campaign on establishing Obama's weakness and his own strong leadership by comparison.
Weakness is a capital crime, said Morris back then. In fact, over the years, Morris, The Hill, the conservative press, and conservative politicians have harped endlessly in fear of appearing weak. Not a day goes by that some conservative pundit doesn’t accuse Barack Obama of appearing weak. In fact, conservatives never shut the fuck up about it.
She likes to be the tough guy.
As opposed to who? As opposed to which historical conservative example? Abraham Lincoln? Teddy Roosevelt? Ronald Reagan? George W. Bush? As opposed to which jingoistic chest-beating potential conservative candidate? Jeb Bush? Ted Cruz? Chris Christie? Marco Rubio? As opposed to which icon of modern conservatism? Ted Nugent? Donald Trump? Sarah Palin?
Rand Paul, perhaps, who can’t seem to decide if he’s the isolationist kind of libertarian or the Aw Shucks Let’s Kill Us Some Brown People For America kind of libertarian.
The hypocritical irony is so thick you could cut it with a bayonet.
A strong opinionate hawk is a good thing when he’s a Republican, but a bad thing when she’s a democrat – and I’m honestly shocked that Morris didn’t work in a “pantsuit” reference or a comment about menstruation.
2. She tends to follow certain advisers slavishly, almost to the exclusion of her own views
Morris opines that Hillary Clinton has no real thoughts of her own, she’s totally dependent on “a guru” to lead her.
Oh, Hillary, you silly lady brain.
If only she’d read more Ayn Rand or had an evangelical holy man for a father to predict her future. If only Karl Rove was there to advise her. And who was her astrologer when she was First Lady? I think we have a right to know!
I suppose I should be shocked at how fast conservative racism is being updated to misogyny, but I’m really not.
3. She has no knowledge of economics
Morris says Clinton has avoided studying economics and has no theories about it.
According to Morris, Clinton believes economics are “best left to the experts,” which Morris explains is a view common to those “reared in the arrogance of the Keynesians of the ’60s and ’70s.”
You know that line from The Princess Bride? Sure, you know the one.
Arrogance, Morris says. After first pointing out Clinton supposedly admits she doesn’t know anything about a subject so she defers to experts on it instead of just plowing ahead – like a Republican would. Hey, I read Atlas Shrugged, I think I know what I’m doing!
“You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means.”
How horrible, I guess, to live in a nation where massive, fantastically complicated systems might be managed by professionals who actually know something about them. Where politicians understand the limitations of their interests and expertise and defer to trained experts. Jesus Trickle Down Christ, think what would happen if instead of amateurs and science deniers and religious fanatics and partisan dogmatists, we actually listened to experts on economics, banking, climate, reproduction, medicine, the military, foreign relations, space exploration, the environment, education, engineering, energy, internet security, electronic media, intellectual property … but I digress.
That would be crazy. Just crazy.
4. She has no deep sense of who she is.
Sorry, who was the arrogant one again?
Goddamn but you’ve just got to love this guy, don’t you?
Morris says, “Hillary Clinton is endlessly adaptable […] She has no anchor, no real sense of who she really is.”
Hillary Clinton has no sense of who she is, see?
Morris does, of course, he knows.
But Clinton, silly lady brain, she doesn’t even know who she is.
Ivy league educated attorney. First Lady of Arkansas, First Lady of the United States. Senator. Secretary of State. Mother. Grandmother. Sixty-seven years old and she doesn’t know who she is. Biggest complaint from the Right is that she’s a tough, confident, opinionated cast-iron bitch – and in fact Morris himself not three paragraphs back called her a hawk, a tough guy.
But yeah, Hillary Clinton has no sense of self. She doesn’t know who she is.
I looked. I did. But I couldn’t find Morris’ similar assessment of Mitt Flip Flop Romney’s sense of self. Or Marco Rubio’s fluid position on immigration … or his family history for that matter. Or Scott Walker, who said he didn’t change his positions he’s just listening to the “will of the people.” But Clinton, who has held the same beliefs and political position for 30 years, who has weathered decades of relentless assaults and faced down her critics from Whitewater to Lewinsky to Benghazi, she has no sense of self.
And Romney will win in a landslide. That Morris, what an insight that guy has.
5. Her worldview is shaped by her grudges.
Morris declares, “Nobody has a longer enemies list than Clinton.”
Nobody has a longer list of enemies than Clinton … unless it’s neo-confederate conservatives who are still mad about how the Civil War turned out.
Muslims, atheists, gays, progressives, activists, statists, hippies, the “elites,” big government, the educated, the poor, the uninsured, women, the unemployed, minorities, environmentalists, unions, immigrants, the sick, socialists, vegetarians, the French, and the list of people conservatives hate just goes on and on and fucking on. They’re defined by it, by who they hate, who they hold a grudge against, by who they declare unAmerican and unfit.
Hell, follow John Boehner’s Twitter feed for a day compared to Barack Obama’s. Boehner does nothing but bitch about people he hates and blames for all the ills of the world, Obama talks about hope and optimism and coming together. Have a gander at Sarah Palin’s Facebook page, go on, it won’t take much to compile a long, long list of the people she holds a grudge against – hell, it would be a lot easier to list the people she doesn’t hate. Listen to one of Ted Cruz’s speeches, any one, pick one at random, it’s a litany of the people conservatives consider enemies. The people Bobby Jindal can’t stand, that Rand Paul detests, that Marco Rubio hates, that Dick Cheney despises is endless and never ever forgotten. It’s how they raise money, it’s what keeps them warm at night.
Morris is afraid a Clinton presidency would implement a “foreign policy by grudge.”
This, this, from the same goddamned people who want war with Iran, who want to murder another hundred thousand Muslims, because they can’t get over the idea Iran has the same exact right to sovereignty as does Israel.
This, this, from the same bitter sulking sons of bitches who just can’t get over Fidel Castro. Who insist on punishing Cuba for defying America, for continuing to exist despite our best efforts to the contrary.
Foreign policy by grudge? What’s Morris afraid of? That Clinton will be better at being a Republican than Republicans are?
6. Her fundraising has totally compromised her freedom of action.
Morris should give up The Hill and take a stab at writing for The Onion.
“Nobody is as bound to the status quo as Clinton, tied down by millions of special-interest donations.”
Seriously? Morris must be a hell of a poker player, no really, because if he can say something like that with a straight face he’s in the wrong business. He could be making a killing on the professional Texas Hold ‘Em circuit.
Again, what is it that Morris is really afraid of here? Because it sure sounds like he’s saying Hillary Clinton is a better Republican than Republicans.
Tell you what, let’s bring up repealing Citizens United, see who runs away first.
Go on, I’ll get the popcorn.
7. She is paranoid and suspicious.
And the conservative hopefuls who just spoke to the NRA, Ted Cruz, Jeb Bush, Rick Santorum, Rick Perry, Scott Walker, Bobby Jindal, Mike Huckabee, Ben Carson, Carly Fiorina and Lindsey Graham, are what exactly if not paranoid and suspicious?
Have you met John McCain?
Paranoid suspicion has essentially defined the Republican Party since September 11th, 2001.
Morris says, “Presidential historian James David Barber defined presidents based, in part, on whether they enjoyed serving. Bill Clinton did. Hillary Clinton will not. Her sense of enemies closing in on her will overwhelm her. She will feel under siege […] making her dark, sullen, secretive and surly.”
Dark, sullen, secretive, and surly?
You’ve got to be kidding me.
Take a look at that list of NRA speakers again. Listen to what they had to say. They’re talking to the very epitome of paranoia and suspicion. Why the hell do you think all those people are armed? They’re terrified of everything, they see enemies behind every bush, in every face.
You don’t get any more paranoid and suspicious then the goddamned NRA. Dark, sullen, secretive, surly? You talk about a siege mentality, that’s the NRA’s very core – and, yet, who’s courting them? Was it Hillary Clinton? Was it?
Good grief! If the Obama administration has taught us anything, if the previous Clinton administration has taught us anything, it’s that a Democrat has every right to feel under siege and surrounded by enemies.
Because they are under siege and surrounded by enemies.
Republicans have made it absolutely clear, have openly declared it over and over and over again, they consider liberals such as Bill Clinton, Barack Obama, and now Hillary Clinton to be the enemies of America, worse than Hitler or Stalin they say, worse than ISIS, the literal Anti-Christ of their religion who will usher in the end of the world – and they have said so, in those exact words, openly, publicly, so many times that it’s impossible to make an accurate count.
Hell, that was Obama’s biggest mistake, he thought Republicans were reasonable people who would compromise for the good of the country – and it took him damned near six years to realize they have become bitter raging fanatics, birthers, truthers, gun waving, bible thumping government haters, who were fully willing to burn down the entire nation just to stick it to him.
President Hillary Clinton would have to be nuts not to consider herself besieged by enemies.
8. She approved NSA wiretapping of foreign leaders.
I had to keep checking to make sure Morris wasn’t talking about his own party.
“ As secretary of State, she had to be aware that the U.S. was wiretapping the cellphones of foreign leaders like Germany’s Angela Merkel. It is very hard to suppose that we would tap the phone of one of our key allies without the approval of the secretary of State.”
Sure. Why not. I mean, Morris is living in a fantasyland anyway, so why shouldn’t the National Security Agency be under the authority of Hillary Clinton’s State Department instead of, you know, under cognizance of the Department of Defense like it actually is out here in the real world. Subject to congressional oversight made up of both Democrats and Republicans.
Foreign intelligence is what NSA does. I know, I used to work there.
If conservatives don’t like NSA doing its job, they should work together with liberals to amend National Intelligence tasking.
Instead, I note The Hill just posted an article gushingly describing how Congress is “closing in on” renewal of the Patriot Act, you know, the law that authorized and vastly expanded NSA’s domestic and foreign collection mission – including removal of oversight and the insertion of backdoors and taps into commercial communications systems.
9. Her contempt for the press is legendary and will lead to more and more secrets.
“Can anyone disagree with this?”
Well, certainly not Sarah Palin. Right?
And certainly not those Republicans who use the phrase “Lamestream Media” and talk endlessly about the media’s supposed “liberal bias” … oh, wait, who was Morris talking about again?
Morris is in fact saying that Hillary Clinton is a better Republican than Republicans.
That’s exactly what he’s saying.
And he’s saying it because unless something completely unexpected happens in the next few months, Hillary Clinton is going to be the Democratic Party’s nominee. I know it. You know it. Morris knows it. Morris and those like him know they can’t stop it, and they know they don’t have anybody nearly as powerful to rally around.
No, Morris and those like him are right now attempting to paint Hillary Clinton as more Republican than Republican. It’s deliberate and you can tell because Morris specifically didn’t mention certain things, such as: Abortion, Climate Change, Minimum Wage, Income Inequality, Marriage Equality, Education, and etcetera.
Morris and his friends are not trying to make conservatives hate Hillary Clinton, obviously there’s no need for that.
They’re trying to make liberals stay home.
Romney will win this election by 5 to 10 points in the popular vote. And will carry more than 300 electoral votes.
Except Mitt Romney didn’t win that election.
And Romney didn’t win that election because conservatives didn’t like him.
Conservatives didn’t think Romney was conservative enough. He wasn’t a Reagan, he wasn’t even a George H. W. Bush. He was too much like Obama. He wasn’t this and he wasn’t that. Conservatives had a whole list of reasons why they didn’t like Mitt Romney.
But they hated Barack Obama, oh yes they did.
And political analysts like Morris thought that was enough.
Political analysts like Karl Rove and Dick Morris, they thought hate would be enough. They had the math to prove it and everything.
But you see, hate, no matter how strong, doesn’t win elections.
However, apathy certainly can.
Conservatives hated Barack Obama, but they didn’t like Mitt Romney either.
So they stayed home.
Two years later, liberals hated their truculent obstructionist Congress, but they didn’t much care for Obama either.
So they stayed home.
And that, that right there, is exactly what people like Morris are counting on in 2016.
They’ve got a clown car full of unlikeable nuts. And Hillary Clinton.
And if they can convince liberals, and progressives, and the fickle free-range undecideds to just stay home, they’ll take back the White House.
Don’t stay home.
Yes, there are plenty of reasons not to vote for Hillary Clinton. Real reasons, not the ridiculous nonsense listed above, but real reasons. Sure. There are plenty of reasons to dislike Hillary Clinton.
If you look, you can find hundreds of reasons to stay home.
That said, I’ll give you three reasons right now not to:
Rand Paul, Marco Rubio, and Ted Cruz.