tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post6827993529362779598..comments2024-03-20T12:34:55.100-05:00Comments on Stonekettle Station: Things That Chap My Ass About Clueless MoronsJim Wrighthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11259550121437562338noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-45369724146518262202012-05-05T06:05:39.267-05:002012-05-05T06:05:39.267-05:00One of the reasons l LOVE reading the Darwin Award...One of the reasons l LOVE reading the Darwin Awards and yet HATE to leave the sanctity of my home, l become too vocal about the idiots, and they just irk me to the point of distraction where l just want to bash them over the head with my walking stick, but l know without a word of a lie it would NOT improve their evolutionary chances. No they have to all come out the day l do and torment me. Some day l will get them, this l pledge...<br />Veronica Bingham - facebookAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-86715883185034260462009-05-04T10:10:00.000-05:002009-05-04T10:10:00.000-05:00Heh, whatever the kid gave me had me not running o...Heh, whatever the kid gave me had me not running on all cylinders this weekend. I missed the obvious WV joke: Michelle, up here not everyone in the store is a second cousin or closer, so they do check IDs. :D<br /><br />And yes, they do insist the addresses match up here. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people changing addresses to skip out on debts lately. And when the checker barely speaks English, you can see how rapidly the transaction time increases for check writers, and hence the irritation of the gen pop with check writers.John the Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03467337009577733553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-42534152317747893812009-05-03T12:40:00.000-05:002009-05-03T12:40:00.000-05:00Okay. That was amusing. I think. But how do you ex...Okay. That was amusing. I think. But how do you expect me to keep track of all those details from beginning to end?Posol'stvo the Medvedhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00573435137467134333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-91518855080447687102009-05-03T08:00:00.000-05:002009-05-03T08:00:00.000-05:00John,
On the off chance they've looked at my ID w...John,<br /><br />On the off chance they've looked at my ID when I'm writing a check, they're looking to see if the names and pictures match.<br /><br />Addresses are immaterial. Until I got married, I kept my parents home address on my license so I didn't have to pay for a new license every year when I moved. And in Mo-town, students primarily have local bank accounts and out of state checks.<br /><br />So the glance is to see if the check book matches to recipient, not to check the address. (Even if they don't look at my ID, I often get asked if the address on my check is current.)Random Michelle Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13817444379694818074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-74382399586605762032009-05-02T21:09:00.000-05:002009-05-02T21:09:00.000-05:00I don't think you're even close to the big leagues...I don't think you're even close to the big leagues in commute times, Eric. Nor in density. I've driven Atlanta at rush hour, and I can't imagine Charlotte's much worse. <br /><br />It just <I>seems</I> bad to you, because you have more people than the hill country around you. It's relative. Most people on my floor have a greater than 90 minute commute. One way.<br /><br />Believe me, the only places I've seen worse than NYC are London and Tokyo. DC kinda sorta comes close on a bad day. Maybe. The left coast certainly matches in LA and San Fran, but I've only driven in San Fran twice, never in LA.<br /><br />And I forgot to add that the cashier squinting at the ID up here is likely to be, well I'll give Wal-Mart the benefit of the doubt and say immigrant without the "illegal" in front of it, after my MIL does work there, now. But still, even more delays, especially since my state does not issue a new license when you move, just a sticker that often rubs off so the address on THE GODDAMN CHECK AND LICENSE DON"T MATCH...<br /><br />Sorry, need a long run and a fewh beers (in that order, done it the other way around, not nearly as much fun after the fifth of each).John the Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03467337009577733553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-87923060986544768162009-05-02T10:08:00.000-05:002009-05-02T10:08:00.000-05:00(And yes, population density is much lower down he...(And yes, population density is much lower down here. While that's probably better for our mental health, it also means we have sprawl and half-assed public transit, so as far as commutes go, any time gains tend to get canceled.)<br /><br />(I'm not saying we don't have it better in so many ways down here--we do. It's just that I think sometimes John and I are from completely different Souths. And we probably are, actually. The South he sometimes describes is a place I have to drive to. :-) )Erichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18275812152895151542noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-10489649665361447462009-05-02T10:02:00.000-05:002009-05-02T10:02:00.000-05:00The one thing I don't miss about the South is the ...<I>The one thing I don't miss about the South is the attitude towards time. But then, commutes are a hell of a lot shorter and there's fewer people down there. Believe me, when there's 2 clerks and a line of 50 Damn Yankees in each lane, and you've just finished an hour drive after an almost 2 hour train ride, the stopping to chat becomes a lot less endearing and a lot more of a sign of cluelessness</I>John, is that the <I>rural</I> South you're talking about? Because in Charlotte (and in Raleigh, for that matter) you can easily find yourself in the worst of both worlds, and I assume that's true in Atlanta and other Southern cities as well: a long commute to stand in a long line that's made even longer by some sweet-but-misplaced elderly cashier taking her time to engage in a lengthy conversation with somebody who--sorry, Michelle!--is carefully penning a check.<br /><br />Which, most of the time, I don't necessarily mind. Even in the urban and suburban South you frequently find this sort of Zenlike state where the wait, if annoying, is at least worth the trade-off of being rung up at the register by someone who calls every single human being who walks past her "darling" or "sweetie" or some similar endearment just by default. People <I>are</I> nicer down here.<br /><br />But shorter commutes and fewer people? Heh. Uhm, no. Well, maybe out in the <I>country</I>, I suppose. And granted, "fewer" is relative--I mean, sure, there are fewer people in Charlotte than New York City, but for the purposes of what we're talking about, lots is lots.<br /><br />(I just checked the pop. of Charlotte out of curiosity--it's around 700k--and learned something: Charlotte's the 19th biggest city in the U.S. Atlanta is 33rd, with around 500k. D.C. has 5.3M (ranking 8th) by comparison, and NYC is (unsurprisingly) 1st with 18.8M.)Erichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18275812152895151542noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-1862887531086131192009-05-02T07:26:00.000-05:002009-05-02T07:26:00.000-05:00Hah. When you wonder why people up North are so sh...Hah. When you wonder why people up North are so short tempered (and I used to before I moved up here), take a look at population densities.<br /><br />And "dense" applies in more ways than one. :(John the Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03467337009577733553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-23136058035444393682009-05-01T22:14:00.001-05:002009-05-01T22:14:00.001-05:00Just for John, perhaps I'll twitter how many peopl...Just for John, perhaps I'll twitter how many people are at the grocery store tomorrow morning. ;)Random Michelle Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13817444379694818074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-82354683152427480212009-05-01T22:14:00.000-05:002009-05-01T22:14:00.000-05:00You have to show ID to write a check? Really? I ha...You have to show ID to write a check? Really? I haven't done that in ages!<br /><br />There are several stores that have credit card machines that if you swipe your card before they are done ringing up, they have to start over again.<br /><br />50 people in a line? Really? I'm much happier if there are fewer than 50 people in the entire store (including employees) when I go shopping.Random Michelle Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13817444379694818074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-41525278147525075462009-05-01T21:39:00.000-05:002009-05-01T21:39:00.000-05:00"And what's the time difference between filling ou..."And what's the time difference between filling out the amount on a check and signing a credit card receipt?"<br /><br />Around here they have to put the check in the printer. It never goes through the first time. And what Jim said about the IDs. Not to mention that no one has the damn check filled out. All the checkouts here have the electronic signing for CCs and Debits - I can have that signed before the clerk is finished bagging, even with me helping to bag. I can also swipe the card before the transaction is done so it goes even faster for me. Clerk's gotta finish bagging and then fiddle with the damn check for the check-writers. If they've finished filling it out by that time. Which they haven't. <br /><br />In a line of 10 at the Wal-Mart, there's always 3 or 4 check writers. And the lines are never just 10 people. The check-writers add at least another 15 minutes to the already horrible Wal-Mart experience, which I can't avoid without wasting gas and even more time.<br /><br />The one thing I <I>don't</I> miss about the South is the attitude towards time. But then, commutes are a hell of a lot shorter and there's fewer people down there. Believe me, when there's 2 clerks and a line of 50 Damn Yankees in each lane, and you've just finished an hour drive after an almost 2 hour train ride, the stopping to chat becomes a lot less endearing and a lot more of a sign of cluelessness. <br /><br />Double on the damn weekends, when all the retired people who <I>should</I> have been shopping at 11:00 on a weekday, decide to go out and mix it up with the working stiffs because they've shopped on a Saturday their entire lives. And they're usually the ones who decide <I>today's</I> the day they're going to learn how to use the new-fangled automatic checkout, when there is a line of 20 people with kids behind them, and when the only form of payment they have is a check.John the Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03467337009577733553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-77597734989017429792009-05-01T20:41:00.000-05:002009-05-01T20:41:00.000-05:00John, I don't set *foot* in the grocery store on w...John, I don't set *foot* in the grocery store on week-day evenings if I can possibly help it. First thing Saturday morning is when I do my shopping, and we take Grandmom late Sunday morning or early Saturday afternoons. Early Saturday morning there are few people, and usually *zero* screaming kids.<br /><br />And what's the time difference between filling out the amount on a check and signing a credit card receipt?<br /><br />I think y'all have been too far north for entirely too long.Random Michelle Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13817444379694818074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-62166190061099061682009-05-01T17:50:00.000-05:002009-05-01T17:50:00.000-05:00Well, see, my problem with the robot checkout line...Well, see, my problem with the robot checkout line is that it <I>talks</I>. I fucking hate that. I hate it. I don't want machines to talk to me. And in fact I hate it so much that next week I'll probably do a "Things that chap my ass about talking robots" post.<br /><br /><br />And I hate check writers. I just do. Sorry, Michelle, but I purely hate people who write checks when there are people in line behind them. They <I>never</I> have the damned thing filled out in advance. They <I>never</I> have two forms of ID ready. They <I>always</I> have to fill out the register <I>right there</I>, even though there's a fucking carbon copy. Seriously would it kill these people to wait until they're out in the car or or something? And they always have the same dumb excuse, if I don't do it right now I'll forget - fuck, how do they get through life? It just takes forever, and when there's ten people in line and they're all fussy old ladies writing checks and totaling up their registers it takes an extra twenty damned minutes. It makes me fucking insane. <br /><br />Of course, there's always debit card Debby who can't find her card. Heh heh, sorry, I know it's in here somewhere. fumble fumble. Hey! Here's a fucking idea, how about cleaning out that overstuffed duffel bag you call a purse? Half these women got more shit stuffed in their purses than a D-day paratrooper had drop equipment. And most of it is just about as useful too. And the ones that really chap my ass are the ones who carry around a fucking miniature dog in their purses and we have to put up with that silly shit. Argh!Jim Wrighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11259550121437562338noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-67794416891016665562009-05-01T17:29:00.000-05:002009-05-01T17:29:00.000-05:00Oh man, Michelle, I'm in the grocery store usually...Oh man, Michelle, I'm in the grocery store usually on an errand after spending more than 5 hours of my life that day commuting. People who chat up the clerks in front of me in the grocery store at at 8PM while I picking up milk for the kids, after having spent 2 hrs 45 minutes on the mobile hell that is Metro North and I-95, get a HUGE hairy eyeball from me. Because the longer I take there the less time I have with the kids, and since their bedtime is 8:30, that's not a lot in any case. (And by 8PM there's usually only 2 clerks in the store).<br /><br />I don't mind the unmanned line because my time is usually worth as much or more to me than whatever it is I'm buying, and anything that gets me out of the store faster is welcome. I don't care if it saves them money because it saves me time - that's a win-win for both me and the store. I just seem to have Jim's luck about going for the "whoo whoo, only one person in the fast lane" line, and then having them be the person who has never, ever used an automated line, and has decided that they are going to learn right now. Yes, dipshit, if the barcode is underneath your hand when you scan the item, the machine won't read it.<br /><br />God hates me, too, Jim.John the Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03467337009577733553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-60615424066982069222009-05-01T16:46:00.000-05:002009-05-01T16:46:00.000-05:00Smacking creationists with a clue-by-four in their...<I>Smacking creationists with a clue-by-four in their own blogs' comment threads doesn't count.</I>Well, no, Scott, of course not. That's more like a public service. And I for one would like to thank you for it.Jim Wrighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11259550121437562338noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-58552247695287577112009-05-01T16:20:00.000-05:002009-05-01T16:20:00.000-05:00Jim: fear not. As a rule, I don't troll, and wou...Jim: fear not. As a rule, I don't troll, and would certainly never victimize anyone else by proxy (or something; though I did just use Facebook, so maybe that's the same thing).<br /><br />Smacking creationists with a clue-by-four in their own blogs' comment threads doesn't count.Dicing with Dragonshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03132972790091524968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-3701914005820068082009-05-01T15:19:00.000-05:002009-05-01T15:19:00.000-05:00John, I'll be damned before I'll use the self chec...John, I'll be damned before I'll use the self checkout lane.<br /><br />I have no desire to have actual human beings replaced with me doing all the work. And it's not like the costs go down, since instead of paying a human they're maintaining a damned machine.<br /><br />But you probably wouldn't want to be in line behind me anyway, because I like to chat with the person checking me out (assuming they're chatty).<br /><br />Also? I refuse to own a debit card. I have two ATM cards, and credit cards, but no debit cards. I have to type in my pin for ATM purchases at the grocery store. Debit they just swipe and go. And if someone has swiped my debit card, then they can drain my checking account and bounce my checks and so on and so forth.<br /><br />And although I pay off our credit cards in their entirety every month, I still have issues paying for groceries with a credit card. It just hits me the wrong way and makes me feel like I'm struggling to make ends meet again. (shrug)Random Michelle Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13817444379694818074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-17553289733473490752009-05-01T12:12:00.000-05:002009-05-01T12:12:00.000-05:00Over here, people who screw up their credit really...Over here, people who screw up their credit really bad aren't even allowed to associate with banks. No checking account, no checks. They have to beg friends and relatives to turn their pay into cash.<br /><br />I'm glad my local post office is fairly speedy and the staff friendly. But look on the bright side - you get blog posts out of yours. :DMWThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09446603415730525882noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-1314188377034901612009-05-01T10:55:00.000-05:002009-05-01T10:55:00.000-05:00"I like to write checks thank you very much!
Of c..."I like to write checks thank you very much!<br /><br />Of course, I get everything but the amount filled in while I'm standing in line or my order is being rung up."<br /><br />That's OK. If you do that, then the transaction time is not <I>much</I> more than a credit card. Sometimes less, if the phone lines are slow. <I>If</I> it's a full-service lane.<br /><br />But you'd better not be standing in front of me in the Express Lane if you do that, because the stores around here run them through the receipt printer to print some sort of code and the clerks never get the thing seated right. Express Lane != check. Ever.<br /><br />Most especially you'd better not be in the self-checkout Express Lane ane with a check, and not only have to scan the items and then write the check sequentially, but then wait for the one clerk working the 6 automated lanes to come back from a smoke break and take your money. Because the payment options on the automated screen do not include "check" for a reason. <I>That</I> is a justifiable cause for homicide.<br /><br />Although close behind the check-writers are the people who don't know how to operate their own debit cards. No, you can't use it if you don't remember your PIN, moron.<br /><br />And the check-writer might not just be technophobic, Jim, they might have screwed up their credit so bad somewhere along the line that the bank won't even issue them a debit card. If so, one more piece of evidence for unfitness.John the Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03467337009577733553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-75450736542433356642009-05-01T10:41:00.000-05:002009-05-01T10:41:00.000-05:00Believe me, John, when I tell you that thought cro...Believe me, John, when I tell you that thought crossed my mind. More than once. Usually when I'm at the Post Office.Jim Wrighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11259550121437562338noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-88057959128017855682009-05-01T10:38:00.000-05:002009-05-01T10:38:00.000-05:00Eric, I think you're on the right track, but you'v...Eric, I think you're on the right track, but you've got your cause wrong. God isn't stupid, He's mean.<br /><br />I mean come on, putting two humans in the Garden and saying "eat anything you like, but don't touch that one apple". The end result was foreordained, even if you do believe in free will. :D<br /><br />And from that proposition we can say that Jim is surrounded by booger eating morons not because God's an idiot, but because, well, Jim's an asshole and God hates him. More than the rest of us.John the Scientisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03467337009577733553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-35612153698763534242009-05-01T09:40:00.000-05:002009-05-01T09:40:00.000-05:00Japanese Bluegrass? Good lord, man, just stop it ...Japanese Bluegrass? Good lord, man, just stop it now. The only thing that video was missing was a lead singer in a little school girl outfit.<br /><br /><br />Wendy, the mosquitoes <I>ate</I> the state bird.Jim Wrighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11259550121437562338noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-87060691152824307872009-05-01T09:28:00.000-05:002009-05-01T09:28:00.000-05:00Not a kazoo to be found anywhere!
http://tinyurl....Not a kazoo to be found anywhere!<br /><br />http://tinyurl.com/dm4xckNathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00648438549121320566noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-35355622330586906092009-05-01T09:04:00.000-05:002009-05-01T09:04:00.000-05:00Isn't the Alaskan mosquito your state bird?
Wendy...Isn't the Alaskan mosquito your state bird?<br /><br />WendyB_09WendyB_09https://www.blogger.com/profile/03788918629240949526noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8243351006478134285.post-43454486694415847762009-05-01T08:33:00.000-05:002009-05-01T08:33:00.000-05:00Steve, you obviously haven't seen Alaskan mosquito...Steve, you obviously haven't seen Alaskan mosquitoes - they're large enough to carry off a full grown bull moose. And they work in teams...Jim Wrighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11259550121437562338noreply@blogger.com