And the beat goes on, the beat goes on
Drums keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
- Sonny Bono, The Beat Goes On, 1967
Finally, they had him.
Oh, they had him.
Republicans were full of joyous bloodlust.
At last, they were going to finish him. They were absolutely sure.
It was bigger than Watergate.
It was bigger than Iran-Contra.
It was bigger than Bill Clinton’s … cigar. Okay, maybe not that big, but it was big, folks. Big.
May, 2013, with great fanfare, Conservatives held press conferences and made the rounds on Fox and talk radio and announced that the House Intelligence Committee led by Republicans would open the definitive investigation into the 2012 attack on the US Consulate in Benghazi, Libya.
And by God, they had Obama. They had him.
There was no doubt.
It was only a matter of time.
It was as if conservatives just couldn’t say the word “impeachment” enough.
In May of 2013 when the committee convened, Republican Senators such as James Inhofe (R-OK) openly declared that the president should be impeached over Benghazi,
“Of all the great cover-ups in history, the Pentagon papers, Iran-Contra, Watergate, all the rest of them, this is going to go down as most egregious cover-up in American history.”
Inhofe went on to say that Benghazi would "endure" and impeachment could come after the 2014 midterm elections when Republicans were sure to take control of the upper chamber.
Steve King (R-IA) did the math,
“I believe that it's a lot bigger than Watergate, and if you link Watergate and Iran-Contra together and multiply it times maybe ten or so, you're going to get in the zone where Benghazi is.”
Obama equals Nixon plus Reagan times ten.
And math don’t lie, Folks.
House Speaker John Boehner took charge. After promising that the Republican investigation was about “getting to the truth. This is not going to be a sideshow. This is not going to be a circus. This is a serious investigation. Our system of government depends on transparency and accountability,” he continued with,
“Who’s been fired over the targeting of conservative groups by the IRS? No one that I’m aware of. Who’s gone to jail for violating the law? When is the administration going to tell the American people the truth? They’ve not told the truth about Benghazi. They’ve not told the truth about the IRS. They’ve not told the truth about Fast and Furious. Now, only one would have to guess. If they’re not willing to tell the American people the truth, it must not be pretty.”
You know it’s a serious investigation dedicated to the truth when the guy running it publically declares the foregone results before it even starts. Almost makes you nostalgic for those old Soviet Era show trials and you have to wonder if John Boehner doesn’t spend his private time in the bathroom with a tube of self tanning lotion and glossy pictures of Siberian gulags.
Led by Boehner, conservatives came down with raging Benghazi Fever. Michele Bachmann, Steve Stockman, Darrell Issa, Tom Coburn, Louie Gohmert, Blake Farenthold, Michael Burgess, Steve King, Trent Franks, Tom Tancredo, Alan Keyes, to name but a few demanded that the Articles of Impeachment be implemented against the president.
Hell, even Ralph Nader joined in and you talk about strange bedfellows – but then that’s nothing really new for conservatives, is it? Wide stance, Ralph, remember wide stance.
As the investigation moved forward in fits and starts, Boehner became more and more convinced that he had Obama by the short hairs,
“The administration’s withholding of documents, emails showing greater White House involvement in misleading the American people, is a flagrant violation of trust and undermines the basic principles of oversight upon which our system of government is built. And it forces us to ask the question, what else about Benghazi is the Obama administration still hiding from the American people? This dismissiveness and evasion requires us to elevate the investigation to a new level. I intend for this select committee to have robust authority, and I will expect it to work quickly to get answers for the American people and the families of the victims.”
In the Senate, Republicans Lindsey Graham, Kelly Ayotte, and, of course, John McCain demanded a committee of their own.
“We have called for a select committee since November 2012 and we are pleased that one will finally be established. The committees in both the Senate and the House that have held hearings have made an important contribution, but in light of the many remaining unanswered questions and the recent evidence that the administration has withheld critical information, it is clear that we need a Select Committee that can bring sustained focus across jurisdictions. We owe it to the families that lost their loved ones in the Benghazi attack to finally get to the truth.”
The committees in both the Senate and the House, which failed to find anything. Those committees John McCain meant, I guess. But, damn it, we must investigate until we find us a blowjob! Ur, I mean, uh, well, we owe it to America, man, America!
McCain went on Face The Nation and said,
"I don't know if it's either a cover-up or the worst kind of incompetence, which doesn't qualify the president as commander in chief."
Conservatives running for office in 2013 used Benghazi as a rallying cry. Texas Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst (R) running for reelection, openly declared that President Obama should be served with articles of impeachment.
“This election is about protecting you and your freedoms, which are given to you by God, but which are being trampled on by Barack Obama right now. I don’t know about you, but Barack Obama ought to be impeached, not only for trampling on our liberties, but what he did in Benghazi is just a crime!”
Fox News, Redstate, Breitbart, The Daily Caller, Western Free Press, World News Daily, NewsMax, The Wire, Free Republic, Before It’s News, and The Blaze all were certain, absolutely certain, of what the committee would find. They were certain, absolutely certain, that Obama’s impeachment would come just in time for the 2014 mid-terms. After all, the deck was stacked, conservatives had loaded the committee, they’d laid all the groundwork, the verdict was all but in the bag.
Conservative pundits began ripping at their own flesh in a Benghazi feeding frenzy. Blood painted the water red and sharks came from miles around for a taste.
Rush Limbaugh proclaimed “This dwarfs Watergate!”
Ron Christie agreed, “This is worse than Watergate??!! WTF?”
Donald Rumsfeld appeared on Sean Hannity and they concurred, Benghazi was Obama’s Watergate.
Newt Gingrich nodded in agreement, Libya was worse than Watergate.
Mike Huckabee boldly stated that the president would be impeached and that,
“I believe that before it’s all over, this president will not fill out his full term. I know that puts me on a limb, but this is not minor. When a president lies to the American people and is part of a cover-up, he cannot continue to govern, and as the facts come out, I think we’re going to see something startling. And before it’s over, I don’t think this president will finish his term unless somehow they can delay it in Congress past the next three and a half years.”
They rounded up fat old National Guard Generals and Vietnam era Colonels and every disgraced Lt Colonel they could find. All agreed, Benghazi was worse than Watergate, and Obama’s role – whatever that might have been – qualified as “High crimes and misdemeanors.”
Even Steven Seagal took time out from saving America to say,
“If the truth about Benghazi were to come out now, I don’t think that this man would make it through his term. I think he would be impeached.”
Steven Seagal, Chuck Norris, you know you get kicked in the head enough, it all becomes clear.
I mean, honestly, Steven Seagal couldn’t be wrong, right? Right? That vast towering intellect? No.
I could go on and on … and on and on and on and on and on la de da de de quoting conservatives on Benghazi.
I could. And I’m tempted to.
But I think at this point it would be best to let let Sarah Palin sum it up and put a bow on top,
“You lied again, Team Obama, but light shall shine on what’s hidden in Washington’s darkness with Republican lawmakers’ laser like focus on the truth. America deserves nothing less! With gravel in his gut and pitbull tenacity this is what America needs. Thank you, Congressman Trey Gowdy and others who are determined to avenge the murders of our brave Americans in Benghazi, and will also prove the insulting, sinful Obama Administration Benghazi cover-up.”
A year ago conservatives were positive, absolutely 100% without any doubt positive, that they had him.
They were positive that they had grounds to impeach President Obama and Benghazi was the smoking gun.
They were utterly certain. That’s not speculation or exaggeration, those are their own words, that’s what they told America. Impeachment. They had him. No doubts.
And so here we are.
And House conservatives are suing the president … over some idiotic inane issue, an issue that not only amuses the President but even conservatives think is just plain stupid. And, oddly, all those “scandals” that were such a big deal, Benghazi chief among them, are missing from the lawsuit. The best they could do was to sue the President for not implementing Obamacare fast enough.
Now that’s just damned peculiar.
I mean, they had him, right? That’s what they told us, they were sure.
So, why bother with this piddly little Obamacare lawsuit? When you can hang the president on Benghazi, right?
It’s impeachin’ time!
The report is complete.
The House Intelligence Committee, led by republicans, has finished its investigation.
Last week the Committee voted to declassify the final report.
Just one little, tiny, almost insignificant problem…
… seems the committee, led by Republicans, could find no, repeat no, repeat no, repeat no, evidence of deliberate wrongdoing by the Obama Administration.
After two years of investigation, after millions upon millions of taxpayer dollars, it turns out that, well, in the words of the report:
“No one was deliberately misled, no military assets were withheld and no stand-down order (to U.S. forces) was given."
They couldn’t even find a blowjob – and you know there has to be a blowjob in there somewhere.
Has to be.
Highlights of the report released so far include:
* Intelligence agencies were warned about an increased threat environment, but did not have specific tactical warning of an attack before it happened.
* A mixed group of individuals, including those associated with al Qaeda, (Moammar) Khadafy loyalists and other Libyan militias, participated in the attack.
* There was no 'stand-down order' given to American personnel attempting to offer assistance that evening, no illegal activity or illegal arms transfers occurring by U.S. personnel in Benghazi, and no American was left behind.
* The administration's process for developing talking points was "flawed, but the talking points reflected the conflicting intelligence assessments in the days immediately following the crisis."
So, a Tea Party driven committee led by the president’s biggest opponents and dominated by conservatives has, after 23 months of investigation, in their own words concluded “There was no ‘stand-down order’ given to American personnel attempting to offer assistance that evening, no illegal activity or illegal arms transfers occurring by U.S. personnel in Benghazi, and no American was left behind”
In point of fact, the committee concluded that Barack Obama was telling the truth all along.
Since 2012, Benghazi has been examined in more detail than nearly any other event in US history. It has been torn apart item by item by ideologically driven fanatics determined to remove the president from office. Benghazi has now been investigated by the House Intelligence Committee, the Senate Intelligence Committee, the independent State Department Accountability Review Board, the Senate Armed Services Committee, the Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee, the House Armed Services Committee, the House Committee on Oversight & Government Reform, and the House Committee on Foreign Affairs.
All of them have found exactly the same thing.
All of them, every single investigation, has come to the same conclusion, exactly, the same conclusion: Dick.
There is no scandal. They can’t hang a single thing on the president other than being in office when America was attacked.
There’s no scandal.
There never has been.
The administration did everything it could. Given what was known and given the confused picture on the ground, given what assets were available, given the timeframe, the administration did everything it could.
But sometimes that’s just not enough.
Sometimes, no matter what, shit happens.
Exactly, exactly, as I said a year ago.
For two years conservatives have been demanding “the truth.”
And they’ve got it.
By their own hand, from their own people.
And suddenly, the party of personal accountability is strangely quiet on Benghazi.
But then it really wasn’t the truth they were after, was it?
La de da de de, la de da de da
And the beat goes on, yes, the beat goes on
And the beat goes on, and the beat goes on
The beat goes on and the beat goes on
The beat goes on…